


No one like you

by Dakine1105



Category: Impractical Jokers
Genre: Depression, F/M, Falling In Love, Flirting, Gen, Light Angst, Love, Oral Sex, Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-31
Updated: 2017-02-02
Packaged: 2018-09-13 14:55:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 30
Words: 28,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9128950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dakine1105/pseuds/Dakine1105
Summary: We met at a mutual friends wedding, his smile and shyness was and still is adorable, I love him, he was afraid to tell me he loved me but I knew. Now its all changing and he doesn't handle it well at times, but I'm here, i will help him, cause when you love someone that's what you do....right?





	1. Chapter 1

I'm waiting for the car service to get here, should be soon, I would rather be home not in this suit, not going to a party, a party I'm expected to attend since the network is throwing it, all those people, I am blessed and grateful for the life I have, I worked damn hard for it as of late, it's alot, I don't relay that to anyone as it sounds ungrateful. My girl comes down the steps she's absolutely gorgeous she has a deep blue strapless dress on, her beautiful dark hair normally down and curly , swept up she smiles at me I love her smile "you look so handsome Bri (she reaches up to peck my lips even in heels she's still short 5'1 ) mmm gorgeous man " I smirk, me gorgeous, ok whatever, Im not sure what she sees in me I mean I am no gargoyle but...She tells me things like that all the time, infact daily she says sweet things to me even when I'm not easy to be with. "babe let's not stay late ok?" she nods yes and smiles I hug her close to me place my lips on her neck she shivers , she loves when I kiss or suck gently on her neck , she looks up at me I wink, I hear the doorbell, car is here off we go. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I watch as he poses for photos with his three best friends, he s such a good man, he has worked hard to be where he is alot of time is spent away this past year, it was is a hard adjustment for us both but its the reality of what theh have become, he's been depressed these past couple of months and its broken my heart, there is nothing, not one thing I would not do for him and when he gets like that , its hard for me, I try hard to help him, but at times I don't think its enough. I think back to the night I met him a little over two years ago, I knew who he was not only from his show but he was, is friend's with Charles the man my friend Leslie married , Brian was in the wedding party, as I was but we were not paired together, he was so shy, he still is in many ways we ended up going to an all night diner from the wedding and talked till the sun came up and after, he asked for my number , I watched him put it in his phone , he te texted me that night and we went out for drinks,he was, so sweet, very quiet as in soft spoken, I felt such ease talking to him, he left the next day for his bus tour, Not ideal but I didn't know where this was going, to my most happiest surprise we built a relationship, and I love him, I love him so much my heart could burst thats what it feels like. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I'm making my way across the room I see who's by her and i do not like it her ex Jay and not cause I'm worried or jealous cause hes an asshole and I want him away from her, I finally reach her and take her hand in mine she looks at me releaved "well hello Brian, now ya doing man, long time no see, well in person anyway, on TV I see you " I nod "hello Jay" "I was just telling Mia I saw her brother Nick yesterday I asked how you were said you were good I was glad to hear that, heard from a mutual friend you two live together in a house thats nice you two bought a house together, " I feel her palm its all sweaty hes making her uncomfortable " have a nice night Jay " he smirks at me then looks at Mia she looks at me and I lead her away, dammit I don't like him, he was so mean to her. " why is he here" she looks up at me " he's dating a photographer from TRu , " I nod and hold her hand tight, she reaches up kisses my cheek" I love you Mr Quinn" I wink at her, I feel my heart beat faster, she's my girl. We talk to Sal and James a bit, Joe and Bessy left already , we are heading out too, say our goodnights and I we wait for the car service to pick us up, I hold her close to me its getting chilly now that New York air is cold tonight we get in and she lays her head on my chest her arm over my legs , I hold her as close as I can, kiss the top of her head, I can't recall a time I ever loved a woman more than I do her, my girl loves me , Brian not Q from TV, the tours, the podcast, she knows me and accepts me for who I am I didn't think I'd ever have that in my life, I cannot be without her, I have to get a grip on this sadness that weighs me down as of late, its not fair to her, our relationship or me, I hear her sigh I look down she moves her face to mine and kisses me, gently , she stops and puts her hand on the side of my face gently rubbing it "thank you for being the man you are, thank you for loving me my Bri" she lays her head back to my chest, I have never loved anyone so much, and it scares me to my core.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *sexual content ahead*

I already showered I hear her turn the water off then the blow dryer go on, Brooklyn cat looks at me from her chair in our room, her throne we call it, I make kissey noises at her she lays her head back down, Jasper our Lab mix is asleep by the chair , he's a recue dog we got last year he s such a good boy, my other two kitties were not thrilled about him but Brooklyn she loves him , I love him. I get up to get my phone charger it's on the dresser by the bathroom, I smell the lavender vanilla lotion she uses I love that scent, I swear I can smell it when I'm away on tour, or it's me missing her so much. I go sit back on our bed she comes out of the bathroom in one of my white tshirts and I see some pink lace panties thru my shirt her curly dark hair down past her shoulders I love to play with it, she climbs onto the bed kneels by me and kisses me I pull her into me and move back so my back is against the pillows i move her to my lap she straddles me I kiss her deeply, she moans it vibrates off my lips, She moves back touches my cheek "you know what I just thought of?" i shake my head no " our first time together " I smirk yeah that's a good memory "what made you think of that?" " the way you just kissed me, made me think of it , but I think about you alot Bri, do you realize how much I love you? You consume me ,in a very good way " I grin It took me a while to say I loved her and not because I didn't feel it, I was scared to admit it, I was hurt so bad before in a prior relationship I swore I'd never fall hard again but I did, . "Mia baby, I love you just as much, You are my girl " I move my lips to her neck and gently suckle it she grinds into me, she moans and runs her fingers through my hair, she absolutely loves when I suck on her neck everytime it gets her , I know it made her wet, it always does, I move my lips to the other side of her neck and suck gently there too I move my hand down her panties are damp, I slide my pointer finger into her panties shes soaked It turns me on I moan and rub her clit back and forth up and down , she moans loudly "my baby likes what I'm doing ?" she nods yes I love watching her face , the pleasure , she bites her bottom lip grinding into my finger her breathing gets heavy, she looks into my eyes so sexy" baby will you ride me? " she nods yes i gently pull my finger out she kneels back then off removing her panties I pull my boxers off she lifts my shirt up over her head tosses it away, I rub my thumbs over her nipples causing her to gasp, she reaches her hands down taking hold of my hard cock she raises her hips up I help guide her onto me, her pussy fits me like a glove I love being inside her, I hug her to me she grinds on me, fuck its so good looking into her gorgeous hazel eyes I see the pleasure on her face, I move one arm from around her my finger finds her clit again, she moans so deep and so long, I kiss her hard playing with her tounge with my own, she rides me harder I feel my orgasm building i want her to cum too I rub her clit faster she moans I feel her legs shake "I'm so close , babe you cum too, cum for me, you're Bri" that sends her over the edge she yells my name and cums  
bouncing on my cock , I'm going to cum, she moves faster I cum in her, I moan, lay my head on her shoulder, she holds me close "Bri, I felt you cum in me, I loved it, damn " I look at her never taking my eyes from hers I suck her cum from my finger she groans, I move her up and off of me I push her onto her back spread her legs and bury my face in her pussy I taste her cum, I'm going to make her cum again "brian omg !!! " I furiously lick her clit, lick her whole pussy, she cums again yelling she came, I move up her body shes panting She kisses me hard , she sits up I do too I lean back against the pillows , I go to pull her into me she kneels and moves her head to my lap, and proceeds to give me an amazing blowjob "fuck Mia, babe suck me, just like that, fuck " I cum she swallows what I give her, she lays her head on my chest I wrap my arm around her, our sexual chemistry is amazing, I love her body and what she does to mine.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *sexual content ahead*

She smiles at me and hands me a water bottle, she lays back down next to me, It's 4:24 am Sunday she kisses my shoulder "I'm going to miss you so much , three weeks, rough" she rests her head on my chest "I'm going to work extra hard getting the businesses done that I committed to, so I can fly out to you I can even take work with me, honey I will fly over and see you " I nod, I just , I've been gone so much already this year, my fear is we will lose the connection we have, she knows I feel that way, she reassures me not the way it will be she faces me "you enjoy going overseas, so much to see there and do, and every one of you're shows are sold out thats huge honey" I nod she's so positive I wish  
I could be more that way, I gently kiss her she rubs my beard as I kiss her I love that, honestly I love when she touches me anyplace on my body,I lay on top of her, Im naked, she has just my t-shirt on she moans when she feels contact , "you better come over, I cannot possibly not have sex with you that long " she grins "no way that's too long, I will have Brian withdrawals, contact with youre body is much needed" I push into her taking her by surprise she wasnt quite ready , "ooh Mr Quinn, that feels so good, little dirty talk or sweet love making?" I push slowy in and a little out  
" well I was thinking sweet love making, since fuck was used in our last ...session " she laughs and nods her head  
"so ...sweet love making, mmmm ok " I pull all the way then slam into her "Bri , damn that's mmm felt so good  
you know thats not quite sweet love making " I grin and pump her a little faster "yah true...dirty talk wins !! " I laugh then look at him ok dirty talk huh "remember last month on the way home from long Island? (he grins) you pulled into  
the parking lot of that Walgreens, we climbed into the back of you're jeep, mmm you just took charge , fucking me  
the things you were saying remember?" " yeah, I told you I wanted you , would have taken you in the restaurant bathroom but too many people, all I knew was I was so turned on that night, I had one goal, to fuck you " she moans I'm pumping harder now, shes moving with me "my God Bri it was so hot, you, pushed inside of me and said you're mine, all of you, every inch of your body is mine , you were on a mission, and you more than succeeded " I slow down a little so I don't Cum just yet "and what did you say to me" omg I feel flushed "Mia baby tell me" I look into his eyes "Brian no one has ever fucked me so good, no one ever will just you my baby" Her words the memories of it I can't hold it back I cum , I cum hard in her I moan and my legs shake, I lay my forehead on hers she rubs my back, "that was hot Mr Quinn, wow " I kiss her face and lay next to her she instantly moves to me laying her head on my chest my arm is around her back, I contently fall asleep. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I am working at my desk at home, trying to get two businesses completed today, I crunch numbers for businesses to save them money, Im an accountant, but with a more interesting twist, I am an independent contractor, businesses hire me I solve their money problems, I went out on my own 5 years ago and its one of the best decisions I ever made most of my work I do at home, the other part is going in meeting the client building a rapport and fixing thier financial future, since I've been with Brian I love it even more as it affords me time with him I would not get working for someone else. Brian fell asleep on the couch, they filmed late last night and in Jersey, he got home after two am, I sleep so much better when he s next to me, I'm dreading him leaving for the UK tour in four days, besides the not sleeping great , his absence is profound some days, being at home working in an empty house doesn't help, one downfall to working at home, Im constantly reminded he s not here. He's grown more anxious about leaving with only four days left, but my ticket is bought I'm flying over 10 days after he's there, He's so happy about it, I am thrilled and I've never been to those countries when my passport came in the mail month's ago, I was so excited, like a child waiting for Christmas, I close my laptop, look at the picture I framed of the two of us on my desk, taken at a Yankee game last summer It's my favorite one of us....so far .... I go over to the couch Jasper is asleep next to him Benjamin cat behind him they all look content, I give Bri a kiss on his cheek , rub his shaggy hair, then go start our dinner, I enjoy days like this the most, no where to be, no where to go to say I'm content is an understatement.


	4. Chapter 4

i keep looking at my suitcase, I know I have to pack, I will i have two more days at home, I'm heading out to see my parent's soon, Mia had an eye appointment shes meeting me later for dinner , I feel like crawling back into bed but I get ready to go, check the kitties have food, Jasper just finished eating he's snoozing in the front hallway, I grab one of my many hats, my jacket and head out trying desperately to drown out the sadness I'm feeling.   
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aww my Bri he texted me he was here, got us a booth I see him as I walk in, He's looking at his phone I walk to the booth "hello Mr Quinn" he smiles his beautiful smile, I lean in to kiss him then sit across from him. " ok let me see them " I take my new eyeglasses out of the case and put them on, he whistles " damn, sexy babe " I blow him a kiss "you like em? I wasn't sure at first but I like them" "babe you're beautiful no matter what , youre wearing, doing, yeah beautiful"   
he's so sweet, my God I could cry, my heart is so full I feel overwhelmed, I take the glasses off and the tears come, dammit , he gets up from his side of the booth slides next to me pulls me into him, I feel like a fool, Our waitress comes up, he asks her to come back, "Bri I'm sorry, you're so sweet, my goodness, those words, you...just became overwhelming I'm sorry" he looks at me " don't be sorry, I didn't mean to Make you cry, just...It's how I feel about you, my words arent always poetic but they are true" I nod and kiss his lips, If I was told earlier in my life that someday A man this sweet, kind, and loved me unconditionally was going to be with me, I would have thought it a lie, no such man exsists, Wrong, he does, he's not perfect, who is, and I've never been so in love. We ended up laughing thru most of dinner, we head out the lobby is busy people waiting for tables, a family with one toddler and a baby are blocking the exit, I say excuse me, they apologize, I say no problem, I turn to see Bri smiling adorignly at the little girl then her baby brother, he's so great with his nieces and nephews, My mind has of course , wandered to us having a baby, he'd be such a great dad, I clearly see that. we head home him following me, he leaves in two days, he's going to be fine have so much fun, his mind won't go to a sad place, that's my hope for him.  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

I feel the bed shake, but the sound of Bri yelling is what shoots me up straight outta bed my heart racing he's not awake this has happened before , I gently say his name and stroke his hair, he's yelling no...please no he soe desperate I gently shake his shoulder, I call his name tell him its me, open yours eyes you're not awake..his eye flutter open he looks at me , closes them again saying my name to come back, I have to wake him I shake him harder he's mumbling,   
he opens his eyes "Bri honey , are you awake?" he nods then sits up he looks at me like hes thinking of something  
he slowly shakes his head , "what babe tell me" he shakes his head no gets out of bed goes into the bathroom closing the door, I get up gently knock "Bri please , talk to me " no response I wait , I hear him he's crying I open the door he's sitting on the edge of our tub, he looks pathetic, my Bri his shoulders shaking from crying his hands on his thighs, head hung , I kneel by him and take his hands in mine, they are so strong, I kneel straight now and hug him , he wraps his arms around me, "youre ok honey I'm here, you have me baby, always" that makes him cry more, I hold him tighter   
he's got me pretty tight too, my heart breaks, this man he puts so much on himself, he worries, his depression sonetimes gets the best of him, this is one of those times, I'm not letting him go till he lets go , Whatever he needs.


	5. Chapter 5

I just can't understand fathom why she is with me, the pain in her eyes is enough to break my heart for good, and I am causing it, I wipe my face again, she gets up gets a clean washcloth runs it under the water then kneels back down and gently wipes my face , she's so damn sweet, she brushs my hair back with her fingertips I stand up and pull her up  
she takes my hand leads me to bed " I'm thirsty are you? " I nod my head yes , she goes to get us something to drink  
I sit on the edge of our bed waiting for her she walks in and hands me a bottle of water, sits next to me leans her head on my shoulder, we sit like that for a bit "You left me....(she looks at me confused) in my dream, well nightmare I was, we were standing infront of the tour bus, and you left I begged you to not leave me, but...." I run my hand thru my hair  
" This is...I am sorry I .... fuck why do you stay with me? I'm a fucking mess , you have so much to deal with, my issues or other stuff you don't deserve it" she stands up facing me " Love Brian, its called love, that simple, you're not a mess , you're human" I can almost believe her she's so sincere" yeah I hAve demons that won't leave me " she takes my hand and hers " And so do I does that mean you're going to leave me? " I shake my head no " never Mia" she nods " then don't underestimate me Brian , it's almost like an insult to me, that you'd stay and I wouldn't I love you  
I know at times you struggle, hell I do too, but we get thru it, I am committed to you, I don't want to be without you I k snow how bad you've been hurt , that's the past I am here , you're present and future, you don't see that? Then I'm not showing you enough is that it? I will show you more love Bri I will , My heart breaks when you're so sad I want you to be ok I really do , I don't know if I'm enough to help you but I won't stop trying, I meant future, I don't see my life without you I can't ever see that, ....I'm here with you ,and no place else I'd want to go, know this and don't ever wonder why I stay with you, it's my choice to love you I will choose it every time . " she's my girl, I stand up and hug her to me, where she wants to be and more so where she belongs. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I'm seeing my therapist, I made the appointment this more she was able to fit me in I wanted to see her before I leave for the tour, I haven't been there in eight months, I didn't want to depend on it, but it may have been a mistake Mia is putting away from grociers she just got back, I go in to help I put away where she can't reach , she kisses me and goes about finishing up "I am going to see my therapist today " she turns to look at me , I feel a moment of panic She walks over and wraps her arms around my waist , I love her, my ex basically made fun of me for seeing a therapist I know Mia would not but it's something I think about , she looks up at me "I love you" then she rests her head on my chest , she looks up at me again " I'm short Bri look at how I look up at you, I mean how do I stop growing at 5'1? " I laugh she does too, " you're a perfect height for me, Its easy to pick you up , carry u around put you in my pocket we laugh , she makes me so happy. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I look at her my best friend of 18 years as much as I love her Im annoyed as hell with her "be mad Mia I am not going to not tell you how I feel , I love you, I care about you, I know you , I want whag is best for you, I do not agree it s him. I shake my head drink my tea "why do you ask how I am, How my boyfriend is if you answer me , judge me basically? He's a good man , he is good to me, the best man I ever dated, he has some issues sure, his life has alot of pressure lately, he has so much going on, he deals with it in his own way" she looks at me "and he is good to you, look I like him alot I do, but....his depression what does it do to you?" What kind of dumb question is that" to me? Nothing to him , enough " she taps her nail on her coffee cup " you seriously do not realize it's negative for you? To be around that mood? That's not healthy for you , you are by nature a happy positive person " ok now I'm done with her "have I changed? Do you see me differently now?!" She shakes her head no " well then what do you mean? " " I mean he's going to end up bringing you down , misery loves company, you have to know he's not the one to build a future with " I take my keys from my purse , put my coat on" I came here to talk I needed a friend to listen not judge You failed miserably at both, Have a good day I love you Michelle I know you mean well, but I am leaving , you can't understand how I feel " I stand up place money on the table for my food "you can't fix everything Mia" " I'm not trying to fix him , I love him good with the bad , it's that easy " " you never learn Mia" "I say this with utmost sincerity Fuck off " with that I walk out of the restaurant to my SUV and head home.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *sexual content ahead*

I'm trying to find the right words, I look at Fran my therapist "I know it's two separate relationship 's, I don't mean to. Compare them I mean I do ,this one is so much better but....I worry that I can't always make her happy ,you asked if I see a future with her, I do , I want kids with her , I she's my one , then that happiness fades, I think I can't have kids what if I pass this on? Stupid maybe Mia is so happy and upbeat, I am too , until this shit starts up, I cried I am a grown man sobbing like a child in my bAthroom in the middle of the night, and she was right there with me, loving me ,helping me, not once did she make me feel bad about myself , so why can't I just be happy I'm always waiting for that bad thing to happen" Fran shifts in her seat " Brian you have a hard time letting the hurts go in you're life, that will wiegh you down everytime, you deserve happiness Brian you are a good person I've known you 4 years now and I know how kind you are you're an excellent son, and uncle, a best friend , and friend to those in need and you love Mia  
And seems she loves you without meeting her ,what you tell me I know this, her actions speak louder than words Brian ,you feel that strongly about her , you have to decide if that next step is marriage, kids and if she's you're one Brian  
Believe in you're heart it's a very good thing" I feel so good , glad I came, I thank her and make an appt for when I'm back from the UK tour. I want to take that step , Before I do I need to know we are on the same page, she may not be ready.  
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I set down a bottle of beer for Bri and a Smirnoff ice for me, pizza should be here another twenty minutes, he's laying on the couch reading I lay next to him with my iPad and search eBay I enjoy doing that nothing imparticular, he moves his arm around me I move my head against his chest all three kitties are asleep in the recliner , Jasper is laying down by the couch enjoying his bone. Brian told me his appointment went well I didn't ask details if he wants to tell me he will " Do you want kids? " I look up at him his beautiful brown eyes , I look into them...he just said that? "Yes, I do , someday , do you?" He closes his book " Yes with you " my heart , it's going to explode, I'm going to die before we have any omg !! I sit up my iPad drops off my lap he sits up sets his book aside "should we start now? I have some new bra and panties on you got me" he cracks up and kisses me... "Mr Quinn you and I are going to have very pretty babies "   
He smooths my hair "as long as they have your heart , and smile " I grin "you're heart and beautiful deep brown eyes   
Gorgeous dark hair I'm telling you beautiful babies " I sit on his lap my legs hanging over the couch, I kiss his face "Mia I love you, it's you and me babe " " always my Bri" I kiss him deeply, I feel his heart beat against my chest, he wants kids, with me him and I me and him, I kiss behind his earlobe he loves that his deep groan proves me right, I want him   
So bad , damn that pizza ok kissing him will have to do for now, I run my hAnds inside his shirt I love his chest   
His arms hold me closer I feel myself getting flushed , "Bri I want you so bad!" He lays us down on the couch just then the doorbell yes! !! He stands up fixes his clothes and goes to the door I peek around the corner as soon as he closes the front door setting the pizza box on the hallway table I hurry over grab him pull him down and kiss him , he picks me up I wrap my legs around his waist kissing him, he carries me to our bedroom he lays me down on our bed stands up takes his shirt and pants off I remove my pants and shirt he sees the purple set underneath he bought me lady bra and panties he moans and lays on me I inhale his colonge and want to consume him he runs his fingers along the lace top of my panties he slowly achingly pulls them down he dips his head and blows on me , omg I love that he dips his head and licks my clit , oh God I moan and grab his hair , he moves up smiling, I kiss him hard "boxers lose em " he grins and takes them off I remove my bra "hey that's my job " I shake my head no "not today baby I need you inside of me   
You're so sexy , my body, your hands, please Brian I want it so bsd!" I love this , she's so wanting me I lay on top of her and push into her , she watches my face , she's gyrating her hips she wants that deep feeling , I hold myself up above her and push harder I'm deeper now her long groans tell me I'm doing what she wanted, perfect she is, she can't get enough of me, God I love it, she moves my hand to her clit, I finger it she's loving it, I rub faster she tells me shes cumming, she comes so much I've never seen her do that, I cum inside of her she lifts her pelvis up till I lay flat on her   
We are both panting , I move my head look at her "that was incredible my man, I cAme so hard " "I've never seen you cum that much baby " " you sent me way over the edge baby....thank you" I grin, and hope we just made a baby.


	7. Chapter 7

He's all packed he leaves tomorrow night, they are taking a red eye out since the UK is ahead of us time wise he's going over his itinerary on his laptop, I go downstairs and open his suitcase I place a note inbetween his clothes I feel a frame? I look and he has a picture of us framed, a selfie he took of us in his old house in his backyard, so sweet I put it back and zip it up, go back upstairs he looks up from his laptop pats the bed I join him he closes his laptop " I'm looking forward to tomorrow , spending the day with you , some city time" "I am too, baby" I play with his hair rub his back he's so tense I move behind him prop up pillows "scoot back I'll rub your neck and shoulders" he does I start with his neck it's stiff " you're hands are perfect man this feels good ahhh " I kiss his back and keep massaging his neck and shoulders, he's starting to relax he's rubbing my left leg "remember bring warmer clothes it's cold there, colder than here " I kiss his back again "and boots I love my boots " he laughs "baby you can't bring all you're boots I mean  
60 pair takes up a lot of suitcase space " " I don't have 60 pairs, I have 47" he laughs more " I wasn't that far off,  
baby you have a fetish , boots, shoes I mean it's cool but eventually space is going to run out , I'll have to build you a closet dedicated to just you're shoes" that's funny I giggle "aww thanks baby you do love me" he stops rubbing my leg turns to look at me "always will baby, always you know that ?" ( I nod) "I adore you Mia, always know that I love you so much sweetheart" I move from behind him and kiss his sweet lips he smiles kisses me back, I turn my lamp off we lay down facing one another " I was nervous on our second date more than the first one , did you know that? " I shake my head no "why on that one?" He smirks " ok first one done outta the way, those are usually good but at times akward, see the second one is the teller, the pre curser to what's to come, I liked you so much, I couldn't wait to see you that night, all day today thought of you, the date , could you tell? " I shake my head no "I had no idea but honestly I was lost in your Brown eyes, I was listening to you, but at times my attention may have been a little off, cause of those brown eyes, and really that's still true today " he smiles I touch his cheek " no one loves you like I do sweet girl  
No one ever will " 

Our day was so good we slept in, we went into the city to some of our favorite places , came home and walked Jasper,  
Made love , twice and each time in my head I was hoping I got her pregnant , if not we will keep trying , I mean the trying part is my favorite, I'm showered headed off to the airport, I drive us since I won't be driving for a while we  
Talk , that pange of sadness is present, I feel it from her too, she will be over in 10 days I keep telling myself her hand is on my thigh she's talking making me laugh, I can see the airport, that feeling is coming back . " you going to watch up on some shows in flight? That always helps with the time, and those new beats we bought so good, the sound on them so worth the money we spent I'm trying mine out on the flight over " I pat her hand on my thigh"it takes you Away I'm looking forward to using them . " I see Sal pulling his suitcase up the sidewalk James is in the doorway I pull up past them good thing leaving this late it's pretty much empty I park put my hazards on she looks at me and smiles we get out I open the back of my jeep get my luggage out, she grabs my backpack for me , I close the back of the jeep up. "Text me at you're first layover in Canada ok? Sleep honey, take your vitamins before you eat so you don't feel sick , I love you , I'll see you soon " I pull her into me and hug her tight I close my eyes open them "will do all of that boss (she giggles) I love you Mia, text me when you're home baby " I feel her nod I'm getting choked up I hold it back She looks up at me I lean down and kiss her , we move apart "me and my pairs of boots will see you in ten days " I laugh kiss her bye again put my backpack over my shoulder grab the handle to my suitcase "Love you baby " she winks At me"love you too my Bri" I walk towards Sal and James just before I turn to go in I turn she waves at me , I wave back she gets in the jeep and leaves, I sigh join the guys. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I'm stopped behind a big truck just as I went around the corner where I dropped Bri off, I wait...and lean my head on my hand the tears spill, I wipe my face they keep coming, I wasn't going to cry in front of him, he doesn't need that, so silly I mean I'm going to see him in ten days, yet I can't stop crying , missing him has become a bigger part of my life than I was ready for, but this is his time , he worked hard to be where he is,it doesn't last forever so I remind myself of that, I still cry but missing him means I love him, and someday all we will have is time together when tv and fans have lessened, I want him to embrace and love this ride he's on, and he does . I think about us being parents makes me smile , I wipe my face and turn on the radio , finally the truck moves I head home singing along to Adele .


	8. Chapter 8

Raise you're hand if you like flight delays , yeah it sucks, but we are delayed in Ireland, reasons like this are why we leave days earlier before our venues, it's a busy airport, we just got some food I'm with Joe in a pub, Sal is eating by the terminal he's crabby, Murr is asleep by him, I pull my baseball hat further down just in case we are recognized, Joe has one in too he does it only when we travel, it usually works since you never see him in a hat, clever guy. "This trip is gonna be great Q I'm telling you we are blessed we sold out every show over here, did you ever think we'd have international fame? (I shake my head no) yeah buddy me either, I saw Mia when she was leaving the airport she didn't see me I was walking across with other people, she was already missing you " I look at him intensely "how do you know?" He sighs " the look on her face, oh and the tears she was wiping from her face " that stings "Q it's not a bad thing , she misses you cause she loves you , that's a good thing " I shake my head "I don't like hearing she was crying Joe....but I get what you mean.....Joey I'm going to ask her to marry me when I go home, I wanna pick out the ring over in wales, will you come with?" He's staring at me smiling , he nods and pats my back "course I will buddy , I'm so damn happy , you are ready huh?" I nod yes " and a baby, we decided before I left, I want kids , I want them with her " he claps his hands and laughs "and that's just what I was hoping you were gonna tell me next, you my friend will be an excellent dad, it's the best Q I've never loved a human more , next to Bessie, than my sweet baby girl, and Mia Will be a great mom, I'm so happy man, (he tears up ) " aww Joey come on " he puts his hand up wipes under his eyes "you're one of my best friends, I ...just know I love you man and I'm so happy you found the much deserved happiness "  
I get up give him a hug and pat his back he was there with me thru my darkest time, they all were I love them very much.

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I'm cleaning our bathroom upstairs, infact I've been cleaning for a while today, couldn't sleep when I got back my plan was to exhaust myself so I could sleep, hasn't worked yet but boy our house sparkles he texted me while the flight was delayed in Dublin he's at his hotel now he's going to FaceTime me soon , it seems like he's been gone days in reality he's only been gone me 14 hours so far , I go to shower than lay down I set my alarm on my phone and place it right next to me , Brooklyn joins me on the bed for some sleep .  
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Omg this room is so nice one of the best ones I've stayed in , I go and unpack  
A few things going to shower than call Mia I'll order room service after my shower so glad to not be on a plane, wasn't too bad just the delay sucked, Sal is next to me, Joe across from me and James up the hall, Sal barely made it to his room he was so tired ,he barely slept. I go shower , set my stuff in the bathroom , dry my hair and put my clean tshirt on and sweat my pants look over the room service menu, call them then hit FaceTime on my cell phone rings three times then I see her pretty face my girl , her hairs up , she was sleeping, I miss her, "hello my girl ,you're beautiful" she chuckles " oh I bet messy hair, just woke up I should be on the cover of vogue , mmm so how's jolly ole England ? " "So far so good, this room it's so cool look at this shower its huge " I show her my room , I'm loving the bathroom there's a Jacuzzi man and king size bed it's usually a double or queen, the view I show her it's gorgeous, I sit back down on the bed " it's a pretty great room honey, use that Jacuzzi too...did you eat? " "waiting on room service oh yeah my vitamins let me take em before I eat" I watch him get them I'm glad he remembered , he gets sick if he takes them after he eats, his hair is so shaggy, I love when it's like that, he says it's room service I hear a man talking to Bri then I see Bri sit back down "ok foods here, you eat? We could dine together " I nod yes " I ate grilled cheese and had tomato soup before " her favorite thing to eat like a little kid I love it "Brooklyn say Hi to daddy she's sleeping with me " I show him his kitty he talks to her making kissy noises she looks into my phone then sashayes away , that's about right for her he calls her name she curls up by the bottom of the bed and is done "well she's rude , how's the other three babies?" I tell him, ask him how the other guys are, we talk for a while I see he's so tired " Bri get some sleep no A lot of it, sleep well babe, love you so much" he sighs "I will....ok love you too , sleep and I'll text you when I'm up Love you my girl " I blow him a kiss he pretends to catch it I smile he's gone I lay my phone back by me and pull the blankets up Brooklyn moves right next to me she keeps smelling his pillow she bats at it with her paw then looks at me I pet her "I miss him a lot too " I say to her I close my eyes and hope to find sleep soon.


	9. Chapter 9

It's a huge crowd out there , it's pretty awesome , we are ready for meet n greets just waiting for the fans to come back  
It's been pretty decent weather wise in London , it's colder in wales where a head to next, the fans start pouring in, it's always humbling to meet them the stories they tell you , some bring you gifts I mean it's aamazing. I'm signing a few things for a woman and her friend, "Q are you single?" I normally say hmmm am I? Or something silly along those lines but I say no I'm not single , they look at each other than me, " awww she's a lucky lady how wonderful for you is she here with you" feels odd talking about her with a stranger "well I'm the lucky one, no she's not here ". Yet I think to myself. I go on talking taking pics, I meet the sweetest little 8 year old girl she's there with her Mom and Dad  
I take a selfie with her, I can tell she's sick , as in an illness I take extra time with her not to make the next people mad  
But 8 years old she's telling me why I am her favorite, so cute , as I sign a hat for her, her dad thanks me he tells me she's had cancer for over a year now and she's still fighting it, and is a trooper , he's so grateful she met me , I talk to him , I can't fathom as a parent how he deals with her illness but it's inspiring to say the least, this sweet little girl Amelia is her name, she gives me another hug and they go, she s tugging at my heart .  
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I feel so dizzy I get up to get some water , I know I'm sick I just didn't think I was this sick I sit up but not stand up till I feel not dizzy my whole body aches and I'm freezing, I am able to get up and go downstairs I get a water and feed all our furbabies I lay on the couch and cover up with the blanket I can't get warm enough my body aches but I get up and get another from the hall closet I lay back down and cover up trying to get warm my head is pounding on F this I am not getting up again , I just want to sleep , no die just die every bone in my body aches I'm freezing, my head is pounding and what do I do? I cry I'm miserable, I miss him , crying may not help but oh well.  
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She always answers her phone especially when I'm out of town something is wrong , I called her phone 12 times left voicemails, I sent texts, wth" I'm telling Sal he's trying to calm me down its not working. "Call her brother Nick he lives closest to see, right? Or is it her brother Vince? Have one of them go over there Brian" I nod and text Nick he lives the closest and answers texts usually quickly I am growing more anxious waiting for him ,he texts back he's headed over he will let me know , said maybe her phone needs charging ? I know that s not if she never lets her phone die "Q she's ok stop thinking the worst buddy" I look at my watch we go out in 17 min for the second show please let me know something I have to go out there and be funny , while I'm worried sick. Dammit . Time to go and no text I focus on the show it's what I'm here for my personal life has to be second . Fuck. We are on stage about twenty minutes my phone vibrates in my pocket I turn to grab the water bottle from the stool behind me grab and look at text it's from Nick say it she s sick, the flu she's out of it , I am relieved ,and hate I'm not there taking care but at least I know, I turn back and continue the show.  
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Nickßß just left he made sure I had medicine, he made me tea, warm clothes he had to get to work he works third shift ßhe's a police officer. I assured him I'm ok , I'm not but he does not need to babysit me I'm grown I will be ok , and he hates missing work, although I worry about him all the time being a cop. I'm in bed with anything I need , I threw up multiple times, which is the dry heaves since I've eaten nothing , my stomch muscles are on fire , I sip my tea and wait to hear from bri. I am up and watching criminal minds I love this show and it's keeping me awake to talk to Bri, my phone goes off there he is I hit FaceTime aww I miss him so much "aww princess you look awful" he calls me princess when he feels really bad " thAnks love you too honey " he tilts his head "princess not ...you know ..come on" I laugh ow it hurts to laugh "kidding Bri Bri the flu sucks I swear I feel like death" he shakes his head no" don't say that...my Mom is coming over soon I think she wants to check on you " "you called her and asked her to didn't you?" He nods yes "she loves you and wants to , I wish I was taking care of you" I shake my head no" no I'm ok and you are having a good time, performing seeing sights do not worry about me , I will be ok, few more days should do it then four days after that I get to kiss you're lips, and I intend on kissing them a lot " he smiles "well that made my day mmm I'm looking forward to you being here baby, " we talk for a bit more, then he has to go love him so much he tells me the same , I love his smile it's so captivating. His mom texted me she's on her way and don't get up she has her key and anything I need? She's got soup she made me and ginger ale , I love her. She arrives in a little under an hour after Jasper loves her up and the three kitties meow at her she joins me on the couch with tea for us both we catch up , she's so easy to talk to " Bri told me he was seeing his therapist before he left, told me what happened , has he woke up like that alot? " I shake my head no"that was the fourth time this year ...but it was the worst one I hope I'm helping him I'm just not always sure " she nods sets her tea cup down " honey you help him more than you know, he told me you sat with me , stayed with him, you are so endearing , you stand by him , that's huge to him Mia and me, as his Mom I worry so much about him, I always have about all my boys , but Bri the most it's evident you love him , he adores and loves you , he's happy , happier than I've seen him in a long while, (she takes my hand in hers) he's fortunate to have you in his life, loving him, he's such a good man (she starts to tear up) I'm glad he has you " I tear up "I'm lucky I have him , no one loves me like he does , no one I ever will I love him very very much " we are both crying she hugs me "Oh I don't want you to get sick!" She scoffs " I'm fine, honey thank you for coming into his life" that makes me cry more, well I must look ridiculous and I don't care, I love her too.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *sexual content ahead*

I see him standing by the curb with the waiting taxi I literally run over he sees me and opens his arms I jump into them  
Omg I am here 13 hours later , finally I can't let go of him "my God you're here I missed you baby" , I kiss him I hear the taxi driver take my suitcase and we get into the backseat , we head to the hotel it's 1:20 pm here ,he keeps kissing me smiling I tell him about my flights , layovers , I look out the window of the taxi wales is beautiful two shows here then I fly to Glasgow and Dublin with him one week here , so happy to be here and with him, the ride was only like 20 min the hotel, is so charming he pulls my suitcase to the elevator doors, where three people recognize him I stand to his left we do not let people know we are together, he wants our privacy , me too, it's what we do when this happens they are asking for autographs some selfiess which he does, then hotel workers come over ask if the three women if they are guests of the hotel they say no and they politely ask them to leave, they do but tell Brian how much they love him, he waves bye to them, I get in the elevator first then Bri the doors close" I believe the blonde asked to have you're baby" he gives me his Bri look "well that position has been taken so..." I laugh we get off the elevator no one around he opens the door with his card key and in we go it smells so good in here I look around and see his jacket, a few hats his laptop, his arms hug me from behind he kisses the side of my neck I Shiver, I turn to face him his head dips down and his lips are on mine and I'm lost in him , I wrap my arms around his waist I feel his tounge against mine I moan he kisses me harder, I run my fingers thru his hair he loves that, I move back and smile at him , he helps me take my coat off I sit on the edge of his bed, he takes his jacket off then sits next to me his brown eyes looking into mine, I move and straddle his lap he holds me to him and we kiss I feel him under me so sexy he moves us back on the bed, I lay on top of him and suck on his neck I move my body and pull his shirt up, I groan and place kisses all over his chest.

His eyes are closed I hear him moan from the contact. I keep kissing his chest I move my mouth lower and kiss just above his belt buckle he moans louder i love it I sit up on his legs and unbuckle his belt he opens his eyes I do not break eye contact with him once his belt is undone I pull his zipper down , I start to pull his belt from the loops he moves his body up so I can get his belt off and pull his jeans down and off, I sit back on his legs I unbutton my shirt looking into his eyes, I peel it off revealing a pink bra he picked out for me, he puts his hands on my hips, then moves his fingers to my jeans he unbuttons and unzips them he looks down seeing the matching pink panties he motions for me to get up, I slide my jeans down my body then straddle him I look down at the bulge in his boxers and lick my lips, I move down his body and lean my head to his waist I pull his boxers down, he is so hard, I move down even further so I can suck on him, I keep my eyes locked with his he watches me slide my lips down his shaft he groans and pounds his fist on the bed , He s going to cum soon, He yanks my hair I stop and look up he motions for me to come up, I do he flips me over and lays on me looking up and down my body "you are gorgeous, I have not had you for seven days, ...seven...you miss me? my body? " I nod yes he leans down and kisses me sliding his finger into my wet panties he rubs my clit, feels so good, I bite my bottom lip he loves when I do that, his rubbing is SO good, he looks down to where his hand is licks his lips, he moves his hand from my clit then pulls my panties down he groans then looks at me I feel so warm please I think in my head fuck me, I need you,I need you in me ,should I say it? he tilts his head barely above a whisper I say "Bri, fuck me" he moves his face to mine kisses me "oh I have every intention of fucking you this afternoon, after the shows, its all I thought about, you think about that?" I nod " did you do anything about it? " I turn red, oh my God he smirks "so my girl touched herself thinking about me?" I nod still blushing " babe do not be shy I thought of you and touched myself, I had to " oh god he is so hot "show me what you did, touch yourself " I can t I mean can I? he whispers show me , I bite my lip and with my heart beating fast lower my hand past my bra, past my stomach, he kneels back to watch I slowly slide my hand in and rub myself, he watches,he looks at my face I close my eyes , I rub myself more its really starting to feel good "fuck baby so hot let me finish " I pull my hand out he takes my hand and sucks on the finger I was using"Bri.....oh my God" he starts rubbing me, oh its so good "cum, cum for me baby , cum then Im going to fuck you like you asked me to" oh thats it, I cum I moan, I say his name he pulls my panties off and away reaches under me unclasps my bra I am now naked "those boxers off " he nods and gets them off, he pushs into me, "you are so tight, my god Mia " I nod "you haven t been in me, in over a week and you are big honey" he nods and keeps pumping me, feels so good damn "will you show me later how you touched yourself thinking of me?" he groans " yeah I can show you how I rubbed my dick up and down thinking of you, " I moan and push my pelvis up so he can go deeper and he does, I loudly say his name he cums "fuck me, oh babe you...ooh " he then lays on me full of sweat I hug him to me, that was hot, Iv e never touched myself while he watched, he was so turned on, I will do it again if he asked, I would do anything for him.


	11. Chapter 11

I'm going thru my suitcase looking for my favorite scarf , I hear Bri humming in the shower, singing now oh I have to record this I get my phone hit record and stand by the door , he's really tearing up Tom Petty 's Free Fallin, he rarely sings, so this recording is perfect, although he has sung more this past year, my Bri. I find my scarf and start putting my make up on, the mirror lights up I love it, so great for hair and make up. I hear him whistling he's out of the shower he comes out his hair all combed his boxers on my God he s gorgeous he winks at me and goes to the closet to get his clothes out, I see a pair of dark jeans , I love those on him , I put my mascera on and watch him pull on a long sleeved black Oxford button down shirt, wow , I was with him when he bought it but never saw him in it , I literally feel my heart beat fast, I finish then go get dressed, I come out as he's putting his watch on, his black boots complete his handsome self , he looks over at me and whistles "gorgeous" I smile " yes, you are Bri" he shakes his head "talking about you babe, skirt and knee length boots , you know I love those on you " I wink at him, course I do, that's why I wear them, I reach up kiss his lips, he pulls me into him kissing me more, after he's done I feel breathless. We are meeting everyone for dinner and drinks, they perform tomorrow night two shows both sold out. I'm so proud of him, all of them they worked so very hard to get here and still do. This resteraunt/pub is really nice, the atmosphere is great in here, Millie James girfiend is next to me ,Bri on my other side, she's quite sweet I'm glad she's her she's staying the whole three weeks, we plan on hanging out in Glasgow and Dublin while they rehearse the shows a bit , they are also filming a tv commercial for over here, and on radio show. Sal and Joe are attempting to tell a story but keep laughing too much, typical and funny, tour manager, photographer and an assistant are here too , takes a lot of work with these four . A few times fans approached, took pictures , got things signed, course Millie and I got the staredown , from a few fans that came over, it happens, a few were even bold enough to ask who we are, tour crew, that's the standard response , if it's not on tour and it's asked, we are part of the IJ crew, who knows if it's believed but I think it sounds good......later in the evening the guys are all shooting pool, drinking having fun, I'm sitting with Mille watching them play "James is better at pool than I would have thought, he's doing good " I nod and watch Brian take his turn , he gets it in then goes for his other shot, just then three women approach him, Sal and Danny their photographer, they talk to them I see Bri shake his head no, Sal shrugs Danny holds up his left hand showing his wedding ring, ahh these women were flirting perhaps, Bri peers over the dark haired girls head and looks at me, I give him a smile, I get one back . "You react so well to that (pointing at the scene at the pool table) you really trust him, well I mean it's not like he's gonna do anything with you here...but I meAn since Ellie came back to work on the set, you've been cool with that right?" I stare at her Ellie his ex? She worked on the thier show for two seasons and left, she's back? " I had no idea she was back. ...how long has she been there? " Millies face drops "oh...Mia I wasn't ....I mean I just thought you knew..I am not trying to start anything I swear to you " "Millie I know that....I do....so do you know how long? " She nods "about three weeks " oh wow three weeks! ? And he didn't tell me? It was a bad breakup in fact she left the show because of it, I know he took that split hard, he's told me about it, she practically lived with him, she's also 12 years younger than him, I feel ...sick I can't believe, why would he not tell me? I mean I'm sure it was uncomfortable for him to tell me but he should have, finding out this way , not so great , I reassure Millie I'm not upset with her at all, really I'm not. I carry on thru the evening, he's a little buzzed by the time we leave the pub, the taxi ride to the hotel is quiet, he's tired and buzzed I'm upset, he looks at me, I look out the Window we get up to our room_ , he starts undressing I go to get my pjs , undress in the bathroom and put my hair up and wash my face , when I come out he's passed out asleep on the bed , in his boxers I cover him with the duvet and get my kindle and get into bed next to him, he's peacfully sleeping, I think a lot about why he didn't tell me, my upset feeling turns to sadness , he didn't tell me perhaps as he's upset she's back and doesn't want to talk about it, you know bring it home to me, cause between us why should an ex be discussed? I am starting to think more and more that's it, and Brian doesn't hide things from me, we're very honest in our relationship even when it's been difficult, I'm glad I had time to think and not react right away, there's a reason why, and it's not to hide it from me, I should know that, this is my Brian . I shut the lamp put my kindle down and wrap my arm around his back, I listen to his breathing till my eyes close.


	12. Chapter 12

She's sleeping, I got up to take some advil, headache from drinking last night I felt good on the ride to the hotel, I was really buzzed, She was kinda quiet but it was late, I remember laying in the bed, that's it, she took my boots off covered me up, she takes care of me, makes me feel loved. I get back up to shower I lean over and kiss her cheek then head to the shower, I take my clothes in with me and my carry on bag, I put her engagement ring in it, I have had it for three days, Joe and I went to three jewelry stores, third times the charm right? It's I knew as soon as I saw , it I wanted it for her, it's a square princess cut , the clarity is flawless it almost looks ice blue under the light, it has three stones down each side, it's delicate , pretty she doesn't like a big gaudy ring, I knew her ring size I bought her an initial ring last year I'm nervous to ask her, I almost wanna do it here, but I think at home will be the place I'd like to remember.  
I put it back then shower we are headed to Belfast today, short flight , and then a day of sight seeing I come out she's sitting up in bed "morning baby, you sleep good ?" She nods I go to her lean down kiss her , she touches my face  
Kisses me back"I better get moving what time is our flight ? " "11:35 only a two hour flight , easy peasy " she laughs and gets up goes into the bathroom, I hear the shower start I get order us some room service,then pack my bag I look at my carry on again her ring is in there I just keep smiling , she comes out , she s so damn pretty she comes over to me, and hugs me I wrap my arms around her, she smells so good "I ordered us breakfast , and tea of course for you" she sighs happily , "I'm looking fwd to you're shows tonight you're playing to such a huge crowd , I am so proud of you, I want you to know that Bri, and I know you deal with a lot with the tour and show , you know you can tell me anything, right ?" I pull away and look at her and nod, " yeah...I know" she looks at me the nods and goes to finish Getting ready. I think about what she said. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I am back stage they are resting inbetween shows, it was a very good show, they are so funny, crazy, energetic, they put on a great show, I excuse myself and go to the restroom ,Millie goes with me, I'm glad she is here . We have a good time together and there's no drama ,Sal had an ex that was full of drama it was brutal at times being around her . We walk back and Bri meets me in the hallway "honey can I talk to you a minute ?" Millie nods then goes back Bri takes me by the hand and leads me into an alcove by the hallway he backs me into the wall he puts his hand on the wall over my head "you're beautiful, I mean so beautiful" he leans down and kisses me deeply , I moan against his lips, He's so sexy , I feel his hand on my hip , he presses his body to mine, omg what I want to do to him, he kisses me more I move my arm around his neck rub the back of his neck he groans and I love it, and him. "I had to kiss you I've been waiting since the first show , I mean really kiss you , I love those boots " he looks down at my legs his eyes travel back up my body his eyes meet mine again. " thanks I do too " he grins then leans down and kisses me again I'm pressed into his body , he feels so good, we hear James and Joe talking ,they are coming down the hallway he takes my hand winks at me "hey there they are, making out in the hallway , get a room " I laugh at James comment Joe grins at us "we have meet n greets you ready Bri? Any lipstick on you?" He inspects him then smells him " well you smell good , you've passed inspection " they continue to laugh and banter , Sal joins them I squeeze Bri s hand then go to join Millie . @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ Great show , I'm feeling great happy too to be back in our room , I just want to devour her , but first I want to talk to her she's making it hard to do that , her lips are trailing along my neck and she's pulling my shirt up places kisses all over my chest , my God she's perfect, I hold her face in my hands kiss her " baby ..JAmes told me about what you and Millie talked about, I mean what she told you about ...my ex coming back, you know she means nothing to me and baby we could have talked about it , really I can care less " is he serious right now?! I just stare at him he looks at me like what? " are you really bringing up your ex? Now? Are you serious?!!! " I look at her, I'm not sure...why she's mad? "We are getting ready to have sex Brian, you and me why the hell would you bring her up??!! I don't want to think about her at all , let alone before we are going to have sex, what the hell?" Oh shit I didn't..think ...oh man. She shakes her head and goes into the bathroom , I hear the water running , I sit on the bed, how can I be so stupid..I just wanted her to know ..I don't care....She comes out her pjs are on "so if it's No big deal why didn't you tell me she was back ? You've known three weeks ? " oh fuck this is not good , she's staring at me "Mia I just...I didn't want to talk about it, or her, it was....is awkward, it wasn't the best relationship ending, it was rough , and I don't want her back on set, but I'm not going to think about it, I mean I am, I do I just....you and I are so good together I never , ever want to lose what we have ... You're my...one ..I think of you and smile, I mean that doesn't happen often and it's you, you've loved me like no other woman has, loved me as deep as much as you, you're my everything and in my head , I just felt if I told you somehow....it's stupid but...and I didn't mean to bring it up just a few mins ago, I wasn't thinking I'm sorry baby, I'm so sorry " he hangs his head his hands are on his lap he's playing with his fingers he does that when he's upset or nervous , my Bri I know he didn't mean to bring it up at that moment, this man loves me so much , him saying what he did , took alot for him to say out loud , I can't be mad , I just can't I go over and kneel in front of him take his hands in mine he looks up at me , his eyes make my heart beat faster he s so sincere, I smooth his shaggy hair back " it's you and me Brian , always " a smile spreads across his face I reach up to kiss him he pulls me up then on top of him , I run my hAnds up and down his body he kisses me deeply I grind into him he hugs me to him and rolls us over so he's now on top of me , "I love you , my girl always " I wink and rub his bare chest, "maybe I will get pregnant here, in the UK, " he raises his eyebrow " I can definitely work on getting you pregnant while you're here " I nod and kiss his face and chest , clothes are removed, discarded into the floor, no other words are spoken a lot of kissing , touching , moaning, and mAking love, three times tonight, well into the early morning hours, I lay close to him I love hearing him breathe, he just fell asleep, the love I feel for this man, is immeasurable, I can never be without him.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sexual content ahead*

We are walking around Kensington square I'm just in awe I take more pictures, I'm so fascinated with all the structures and buildings , a lot of history and I'm here with my man, I've had a lot of fun, sadly I leave tomorrow, but I'm glad I got a week with him, and seeing the shows , sight seeing, and is time which is a treasure to me, I'm going to miss him terribly but, I keep reminding myself , he will be home soon and a whole week with him I'm lucky. We go to have lunch and find a booth in the back of the pub we order our drinw he takes my hand in his "I want you to stay, I know you knew that but I have to say it, I've been spoiled with you here and I've loved it....you wanna reconsider?" I squeeze his hand " baby you know I'd love to, I have clients that need work done, and our furbabies " "you can work from here, and Danny will take care of them longer, come on baby" I shake my head no as much as I want to I can't "honey I have in office meetings with clients next week I can't miss those, it's been so great babe, I'm glad I was able to be with you this week , and you'll be home in two weeks, well 12 days , we had fun right?" He nods " just hate you're leaving " I nod but what else can I say, we talk eat lunch then get a taxi back to the hotel , he lays on the bed and gestures for me to join him, I lay next to him he pulls my body onto his , kissing me running his hands down my body back up resting one hand on my ass the other by my neck " you think it's normal I want to kiss, touch you as often as I do? " I grin and nod yes " quite normal I mean I am kinda irresistible " he agrees by nodding then kisses me deeply I moan I love his kisses like that, I feel him under me , mmm feels good against my body, I sit up and grind on him , gyrate my hips he holds my hips and thrusts up , so sexy "I'd like to ride you Mr Quinn, is that something you might like for me to do?" He nods I lean down unbutton his flannel let my lips kiss all over his chest , I love his chest , he quietly moans and pulls the bottom of my shirt up , over my head I raise my arms he pulls it off his hands immediately grab my boobs , he leans up removed my bra then sucks each nipple circles his tounge around them, he lays his head back down on the pillow I get up remove my jeans, then panties he licks his lips as he's taking his jeans and boxers off I sit on him he pulls me up then helps guide me onto him on my God it's so good , I need a moment to adjust to his size I'm full of him, I place my hands on his chest he squeezes my ass " I'm inside of you, you feel me ? " I nod I bite my bottom lip "I fit perfectly inside you" "Bri you fill me up, I love feeling you , I ...(oh God he thrusts twice I yell his name and grind on him, we have a rhythm, it's too much my God he's incredible, he moves his hand down I feel his finger on my clit I groan and bounce on him " I fucking love you, baby...tell me...who's fucked you the best , hmmm say it baby" he s so sexy I love when he asks me this "you...just you my Bri, no other man has...or ever will.. You fuck me the best, no one Bri just you!" He holds my hips tight then moves one hand to rub my clit again , I'm bouncing so hard he's thrusting into me, he yells he's cumming , I feel him cum in me , that makes me cum , my God this man , I look at him, shiver than lay my head on his chest he wraps his arms around me , steady my breathing I look into his eyes " that was ...breathtaking, wow " he kisses me "I'm still hard " he is too didn't take long for him I feel him still in me he smiles "want more ?" I nod yes and slowly move off of him he moves me next to him then gets up and kneels behind me, oh God this position I feel him soooo well , he puts his arm under my waist and moves me up so the pillows are under me, he trails kisses down my back, grabs my hips and plunges inside me I moan and grab the sheets , he's just pumping in me so hard I could scream "am I hurting you baby?" I say no tell him harder , oh he obliges , " oh God Mia, fuck.....you're pussy so good" he cums oh my God I love feeling him cum in me , my legs are weak I lay down flat he pulls out and lays next to me his arm on my back, now that was a magnificent send off.


	14. Chapter 14

It's freezing here, and snowing like a fiend, Jasper loves the snow, me not so much but I love watching him run thru it in the backyard....I'm exhausted it's 4:35 pm here but I'm going to get into my pjs, I've been home a day , I'm still on the UK timezone, but the cold snowy weather makes me happy to change into pjs and get into my comfy bed, I lock up set the alarm all three kitties are snoozing, Jasper comes upstairs with me , I change climb into bed I text Brian let him know I'm going to sleep, talk to him later, jasper jumps up and we drift off.  
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Heading in a van after our show, tired but extremely grateful the show tonight what an amazing crowd, a lot of fun fans at the meet and greet , I'm looking forward to a shower and bed, we get to the hotel , I'm on way up to my room when I get a text , not recognizing the number read the text, I stop and re read it, it's from my ex his did she get my number , it was changed last year, I don't want to reply but with her coming back to work on the show, I don't want it to start on a bad note, I text hello back, I'm doing well, she goes on to text me about how she's excited to be back she hopes I'm doing well, I say I'm doing very well, hope she is too , I'm heading off to bed and I text giodnight. I go to shower and the feeling in my mind , and heart like I did something I should not have but it's just texts, I'm with Mia So this stupid feeling...I don't get it and I fucking hate it. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ My meeting went well, the business is ran by Anthony Velotta who I found out went to high school with Brian, and the other guys, he had his graduation picture on his desk, I noticed it said the same high school as Bri, and we got to talking he actually graduated a year after Bri, we chatted about Brian , I gathered my laptop and paperwork and head out, shaking his hand telling him I'd be talking to him within a few days,when I have the figures daddy for him, and head home once home Bri calls me , FaceTime I pick up he's got his hat on he looks so adorable "there's my girl hi baby" I smile "hi babe, just got home, hey the business I'm working on, is ran by Anthony Velotta that name sound familiar?" He makes a face " yeah he went to school with me, why ? He s a huge jerk " I'm thinking um...ok he rubs his beard " oh...well I'm working for his business, he knows you ,why is he a jerk? " he gives me a look and I see he's not happy, "cause he is , and I'm sure he still is so good luck working with him " I am getting annoyed so I just don't want to talk about it anymore "what time is it there? Last night's crowd was huge, I love seeing the pictures you post and the other guys, is it still surreal honey ?" I nod , she just drops the Anthony conversation , just like that, fine whatever I'm getting in a bad mood, I'm listening but thinking about that jerk , I hate she's working for him he was a huge jerk , I'm pretty sure he hasn't changed, he and I in particular didn't get along, but there he is talking with my girlfriend acting like him and I were buddies, what a dick , I can't hold back "you know he was not my friend, in fact we didn't get along, he actually picked on me too " she looks at me she starts to speak "just forget it, I meAn does it even matter at this point! I have a tv show, he works for some company" she looks at me " Brian I had no idea , you didn't get along with him, I'm sorry I brought it up " I'm mad now "yeah I am too Mia" she s mad I can tell "I'm sorry Brian, ok fine let's just drop it, in fact let's drop this whole conversation, I'll call you later". "Fine whatever bye" I hit the button I'm pissed but at myself for being such an ass , dammit Brian you're brilliant.


	15. Chapter 15

"You gotta shake this mood Q" I look at Sal I know he meAns well, but I'm not shaking anything, I'm mad I said what I did I'm mad I answered Ellie s text , I know I have to get outta this mood, I tell Sal all of it...he looks at me he s thinking, "you can't text Ellie I know why you did it I get that, but you two ended things badly, plus it's not good for you're relationship with Mia, and I know this relationship with Mia is something you are deep into, I know how happy she makes you, I've honestly never seen you this happy, and you getting mad about Velotta,was more so cause you're mad about texting Ellie" I look at him shake my head, " when did you get to know so much about me? " he smirks "oh I've had like 24 years to get to know you ...so I mean impressive? Yeah maybe but that's me seriously Q talk , text, FaceTime, or all three, let Mia know you didn't mean it" I nod I appreciate him listening to me, what's more caring enough about me to listen " thanks Sal, you always are here for me " he pats my back stands up"always will be Q, always "  
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I'm going over figures reading what Velotta business spent the last two years , I keep thinking of Brian, he sent me a text apologizing, he had stuff to do for promos they are shooting over there, I said we can talk later, and I love him   
And that's all, he rarely gets mad at me, so when he does I get hurt easily, and it's not something I want to do, in fact I try hard to let it bother me, any couple fights, has disagreements, and I know we are not the exception to that, but he's not the mean kind of guy, in general, so when this happens I feel like a puppy that got kicked and I hate it.  
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We are talking , I just got home from my manicure , he smiles "they look good babe, I love you're fingers , I love   
All of you my girl " I miss him,my God these last few dAys are just dragging "so listen yesterday and today I've felt nauseous now I'm not late....Yet in fact I'm due for it the day before you get back so ...IF ...I was thinking I'd to a pregnancy test when you're home, IF I don't get my period." He smiles so big, he looks excited "aww babe I hope you are, I mean if you're not, we keep trying but you think? You feel different? You think there's a little Quinn in you're belly?" I wish I could hug him, hold him, " I've felt nauseous, for two days could be from the flights you know I tend to get sick after I fly, but...I'm hoping there's a little Quinn in my belly" we talk for a while, I hope four days fly by   
Missing him sucks, but loving him is so great, so taking the hard times, is ok because the outcome of loving him , and him loving me is so worth it, everytime.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sexual content ahead*

He's home I'm so happy driving home, he looks amazing, he also looks tired, I'm so glad he's home he is too, he's filling me in on Dublin shows, the UK shows sounds amazing and he's still on a high from it, he brings his suitcase in I help with his carry on, Jasper and the kitties surround him they missed him too he's loving it, I am too he's so happy laying on the floor with his furbabies, he gets up gets them all treats, "hungry babe?" He shakes his head no " I ate at my last layover, I need a shower and you " I hug him close to me he's home I'm so very happy. We go upstairs, and he goes to shower I move his suitcase by the closet , change and lay on the bed, I hear him humming , the familiar sounds him here it's so great, the simplest thing of him home, these things make me happy. He comes out towel wrapped around his waist , my God he's sexy he gives me his beautiful grin and lays on his stomach on our bed next to me .. he rolls over flat on his back and puts his head in my lap I run my fingers thru his gorgeous damp hair he looks so content "so when can you take a pregnancy test ? " I smile lean down kiss his forehead "well tomorrow officially but I was planning on trying tonight I mean it's just a day early but. I was worried if that would screw it up or ... I don't know what do you think.?" He looks up at me and mouths tonight I lean down kiss him, we both get up and I get the test out, open it he looks at it holds it "so you pee on this and we know if we made a little Quinn ?" I giggle and nod yes "ok then get to it baby " I take the test and he goes into the bathroom, I come out after sit next to him the test waiting on the bathroom counter "at 9:34 we will know I timed it "he nods takes my hand in his looks down at our intertwined hands "I love you, like no one I've ever loved and having a baby with you , weather you're pregnant now or not...is it's a dream come true that I didn't know I wanted till you " I kiss his sweet face, my God this man is amazing, how did I ever get so lucky ...I lean my head on his shoulder... "Baby it's time "I look at the clock it is "left's look together" he gets up comes with me, it's a very short distance to go, I feel exce, nervous, anxious , scared and thrilled we look at it , he looks at me, "baby two lines , it's...we..you're" he covers his mouth I gasp look at it again stare at it, I'm pregnant we look at eachother I wrap my arms around him he holds me close we move and look at one another, "Brian you're going to be a dad " he tears up which makes me tear up "Brian we made a baby we are going to be parents !!" We hug, he spins me around I kiss his face over and over " I love you Brian Michael Quinn" he puts me down kisses me puts his hand on my stomach "I love you my Mia, and I love our baby " we kiss , he walks me to our bed he puts his hand on my stomach again and smiles , "I'm going to be a dad, thank you baby " I put my hands on his chest and kiss him, we lay on our bed I run my hAnds along his chest, his sides his towel is still on, it's a slow pace, lots of kissing, touching, removal of his towel, and my t shirt and panties, his lays fully on me "wait..am I hurting the baby?" I grin and shake my head no " you're not hurting the baby, and also you won't hurt they baby when you're inside of me, in case you were wondering" he Snickers "yeah I was wondering" I laugh and kiss him deeply , he pushes inside of ms, my God it feels so good, he feels so good everytime, our eyes never leave one another's, his beautiful brown eyes see into me, into my heart, we have a life together, a baby on the way, me and my Brian, always.


	17. Chapter 17

My Mom is very excited, I mean she may burst, it's amusing to me, my family's happy , my dad loves his grandkids he's happy to add another in his words, Mia told her two older brothers she's close with them one lives here , Dominic the other Joe lives in Ohio, where Mia is originally from, she moved her with Dominic 11 years ago to help him get his business off the ground,and ended up staying, which I'm ever grateful for. Her mom and her don't have a good relationship , she was mad she stayed in New York she wanted Mia to take over her flower shop businesses but it wasn't what she wanted to do, she was told at a young age that's what was happening, her dad who passed away three years ago, I wish I could have met him, Mia adored him, he always told her , you do what makes you happy , Mia told me stories about him, she misses him alot. She was going to call her mom today to tell her, she really didn't want to but we talked about it, she agreed, she's two months along now, she's not been sick at all which is a great thing I hear her in the kitchen when I get home from my podcast taping, she's chopping veggies"hi my Mia " I kiss her, lean down and kiss her belly "hi little Quinn daddy's home " she smiles at me but she looks sad I wash my hands and go back to her "can I help babe ?" She shakes her head " if you can start the rice , chicken is all cut up, veggies almost done, oh and I called my mom today , told her about the baby, she called it a bastard, which really it's not cause I know who the dad is, I mean being unmarried doesn't make our baby that, she also said she's ashamed of me....so not the best call I've had ever, (she looks at me now she s so hurt ,her eyes are filling with tears ) I tried to convince myself all day it didn't matter , she didn't matter, but dammit , it hurts, alot....so if this how she's going to be, so be it, I'm done Brian I'm just done with her, " she bursts into tears I wrap my arms around her she's sobbing into my chest, I feel so bad, I feel anger towards her mom, how can she say those things to her? Dammit, she's so upset it's hurting my heart I move her back and wipe her face with the hem of my shirt, I hold her face in my hands, "I know it hurts what she said, and it was cruel and not needed, and pretty damn stupid, but he one opinion , doesn't matter, our baby is loved, and so wanted, you are an amazing woman, you're going to be more of an amazing mom, I adore you baby, and my family loves you , you've got a lot of love in you're life , and you deserve it all, you hear my words?(she nods and wipes her face ) no one's going to make you feel this way, cause you're better than that " she nods, clears her throat "I...love you my Bri, thank you, thank you baby " she reaches up and kisses me "no one loves you like me Mr Quinn" I adore her " oh I know that babe and no one loves you like I do my Mia " she hugs me tight, I hope she feels better , I finish helping her cook , we talk about the appointment in two days, hearing our babies heartbeat for the first time, I'm so freaking excited to go, our baby , I still can't believe I'm going to be a dad . @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ "I'm just saying Joe is a stellar name and goes well with Quinn " I laugh at Joe he's selling his hand hard "buddy I should have never told you we're using it as a middle name ,if it's a boy" he scoffs "hey I'm honored " "it's after her dad not you , Joe " Joe waves Murr away we laugh Sal shakes his head "it's a great name and I'm on board , let Mia know " I nod and laugh , we are heading in the direction of Landon Joseph Quinn, the girl still undecided, we are not finding out the sex of our baby, we both want to be surprised, I love she wanted that too, I just love her so damn much, I have days I feel I'm undeserving of her love, she'd be so upset I thought that but I do , it hasn't been as much like it used to but it's still there, depression never fully goes away for me, but it gets better , cause of her, my family, my three guys, and my unborn baby. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ We are waiting for the Dr to come in , he's so adorable, he looks around the room at the pictures, the models on the table of a uterus , a baby in it, the stages of pregnancy, he tilts his head then looks at me "it's like a play model uterus,you think toys R us sells it? Like Hasbro makes it?" I laugh and shake my head no he's so funny, I just love him so much , the Dr comes in, shakes hands with Brian does a double take ahh he recognizes him, they chat for a few minutes, then the Dr greets me asked how I'm feeling, I've been here once and I'm glad I've found him, he's great He has me lay down , Bri stands by me and holds my hand, the Dr pulls my shirt up and places the monitor on my belly, he searches for the heartbeat, then we hear it faintly, he turns the volume up, oh my God it's the most precious,beautiful thing I've ever heard, I cry happy tears, I look at Bri, tears roll down his face he smiles at me, mouths I love you to me, he can't speak he s so emotional, I love him , love our baby, that heartbeat is wonderfully amazing , Dr says it's a good solid beat, beats per minute point to signs of being a boy, faster beats point towards a girl,it's not precise but I wonder ...a boy? Hmmm Bri bends down pecks my lips smiling.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *sexual content ahead *

I'm watching her , she's just beautiful , she's sitting in the recliner in our bedroom reading, I'm on my laptop on the bed I'm supposed to be writing for the show, but my mind is on her...reading what to expect when you're expecting, my girl my....I've been thinking alot about when and where I want to propose , I keep going back to here our home, I just ...want it to be special and with her , she'd love it ...I get up to go my dresser in the top drawer in the back under many pairs of socks is the ring box, I take the ring out and hold it in my palm , I turn and look at her ,she's intensely reading this ...yes now....I lean down kiss her she smiles leans up kisses me , " writers block? " I grin and kneel by her she leans on the recliner arm and kisses my nose "baby I love you, and you are my girl, the love you give me is like no other, everyday I'm so glad we met, that day on my life got better , I adore you,our baby and our life,(I hold up the ring she gasps and instantly smiles ) Mia, marry me baby ,will you be my Mrs Quinn?" She nods yes ,tears rolling down her face she gets up and we hug she kisses me looks at me "I love you Brian, I will marry you, I'll marry the hell out of you!" I burst out laughing put the ring on her finger, and hug her tight . I'm getting married, I'm gonna be a dad , I'm so happy, so damn happy . She looks down at the ring "it's gorgeous honey when did you get it?" I grin "in wales I had it when you came to visit me I wanted the right moment I mean was it?" She smiles so sweetly at me "it was the right moment, any moment with you babe any, it was perfect, I love you my Bri... I'm going to be you're wife!!!!!" She hugs me tight, I wrap my arms around her so tight " she reaches up to kiss me, her lips are so soft, she smells so good that lavender and honey lotion love it. "You had my ring in our hotel rooms with me there, sneaky man....love it, does anyone know?" I nod " just Joe he came with me to pick it out, he was , is really happy for us...baby news, engagement news....We have a lot to celebrate " she nods kisses me again, "I'm in love with you, you know what else? I genuinely like you, you're such a good person, a man that is the sweetest , so kind, I've known people who are in love but since necessarily think the other person is the best, like I do you, even if weren't in love, you'd be my best friend " I look at her, just hug her to me, I tear up, I'm not sure how or why, I've got her and I'm never letting her go, she rubs my back , I move her she smiles and takes my hand walks me towards our bed, we lay side by side she runs her fingers thru my hair, kisses my face "I'd be you're best friend, but no way in hell I wouldn't kiss you and touch you, which would lead to sex....so...like friends with benefits" she smirks, " so you think I couldn't resist you huh? " I move her onto her back and brace myself over her, grind on her a little "you can't, I already know that, you want me all the time , you're body language, you're looks, the way you kiss me(I kiss her) the way you touch me (I run my hand up and down her side) and (I move my lips to her neck, I gently suckle it, she moans and squirms under me she absolutely loves it, and every time makes her wet, I kiss where I sucked then switch to the other side, repeat she moans again and holds my hair in her hands tugging it I move my hand to the waistband of her leggins, slide my finger down, she's soaking wet, I groan) "you know how excited I get when you're wet from me doing that to you ?" She nods " I feel it too up against me " she bucks her hips up I push her yoga pants and panties down I lick my lips she bites her bottom lip "that's a sight I'll never grow old of , remember the first time I licked you down there ?" She blushs and nods, so damn cute " you're house , you're bed, I still don't know how you're tounge swirls like it does, but I'm ever grateful " I laugh , wink at her and pull them completely off, I move down her body she's already moaning, I part her legs I love her body I lick her clit slowly she moans so loud,I'm so turned on, I lick her faster she's moaning, writhing I hold her thighs down she s yakning my hair, saying my name, she cums her legs shake, fuck so sexy and I did this to her, I move up her body and kiss her she grabs my face kissing me deeply"thank you, that ,,you are perfection, now fuck me Brian Quinn! " I raise my eyebrow her hands are in my boxers rubbing my dick up and down I yank my sweats and boxers down and thrust into her, she smiles and kisses me "that's exactly what I wanted, thank you Mr Quinn" I grin " what my baby wants, I give her " I speed up the pace, it's so good, I'm so excited, I cum inside her, I collapse on her she rubs my back kisses my head "I love you my Bri , always " I nod , I'm panting I kiss her neck then move to look at her "I love you too my future Mrs Quinn"


	19. Chapter 19

"This is such great news , you know I'm so happy for you both " I hug Joe then Sal, the Murr all congratulating me on being engaged, they all knew about our baby . We are filming on Staten island today which I love we are literally 20 minutes from home. I'm texting my girl she's heading out to meet a client , tell her be safe and I love her, I look up and Ellie is standing by me, geez. She smiles at me "what's up Brian ?" I shrug " not much , just waiting to film " she nods "you look good, I've always liked the longer hair on you, suits you " I don't want her commenting about my appearance, I don't wAnt her to talk to me at all I don't reply , it's awkward and annoying she just stands there looking at me, I remember the hurtful things said towArds the end of the relationship, that's what I recall , sadly not the happy times cause course there were those, yet that's the memories I think of, then my mind goes to my Mia, when I first saw her at the church , then reception, I couldn't take my eyes away from her, she noticed and smiled at me during the best man's speech my heart actually beat faster . Talking to her was so easy I was nervous but not long , once we went to the all night diner and talked till the sun came up I knew she was going to be mine, sounds cliche but it's true, I've never been instantly attracted to a woman physically and emotionally, and that night I was, the first time she told me she loved me , she was at my house, we were sitting on my couch watching spider man, she didn't mind at all actually she enjoyed it which I loved , we were talking just after it ended, she reached up and moved some hair from my eyes , and said "I love you Brian Quinn, very much so " I loved her too but was afraid to say it, I smiled then she said "I know you love me too, you'll say it when you feel comfortable" then kissed my cheek , I'll never forget that moment , ever. I look up and she's gone , lost in my thoughts I smile to myself and text Mia I'm almost done. I miss her terribly today , more than usual , we WRAP up and I say my byes then walk out to my jeep , I hear her call my name I turn around "Bri could you jump me my car won't start" I look at Ellie , I nod to get into my jeep follow her to her car, I set up the cables and takes a few tries then it starts, I unhook the cables she gets out of her car and walks to my jeep door "I really appreciate you're help thanks Bri " I nod "you're welcome" she puts her hand on my arm, I move away " is this how it's going to be? You barely talking to me? " I look at her "I don't have much to SAy to you so what do you want from me? We owe one another nothing " " you're being...I mean we dated and you act like you don't know me " I sigh "dated as in the past, we aren't friends Ellie years passed we each have lives, no need to talk just do what you need to and hello, goodbye whatever, cause I'm not doing this with you " I see she's annoyed and I don't care , I nod get into my jeep she goes to her car and pulls a way, I head home deep in thought. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ He's got something on his mind , I turn to put dinner leftovers away and he presses me into the counter leans down and kisses me I wrap my arms around his neck and gently kiss him back he moves back "I missed you more than usual today " she smiles " I love hearing that, unless it made you sad " I shake my head no " she pulls the hem of my T shirt moves it u over my head, then places gentle kisses all over my chest and stomach, her soft lips pressed into my skin, it feels so good, she looks up at me unbuckling my belt, unzipping my zipper, she pulls my boxer waistband exposing me I go to kiss her but she kneels in front of me_I moan as soon as her sweet lips and mouth suck on my tip then she takes my dick into her mouth and I moan loudly, she holds onto it and sucks on me, fuck it's so good, I pull her hair and pull it she moans I feel the vibration on my dick, she's so sexy my God I am not going to hold out much longer but it feels so good , I look down see her sucking me and I cum , I lean over her head to hold the kitchen counter damn , she finishes up then stands up "I thought about doing that to you all day, mmm glad I finally got to " I kiss her deeply " all day huh ? " she nods , sexy as hell.


	20. Chapter 20

I'm playing with his hair his head is in my lap in our bed the fluffy pillows behind my back feel so good , they are new and so comfy , I love him , I love playing with his hair, it's so thick and lush , and it calms him and I love touching him it's addictive, and he doesn't seem to mind. "Baby if we have a girl she's not dating till she's like 28 and I'm never going to like any guy she dates " I laugh "and what has prompted this ?" He plays with my fingers " just these teens , kids on set today for help with a challenge, these boys were just so ...eh I was young I know I was after girls, and one thing and if I have a girl the universe is paying me back for some bad choices and no guy Will ever take advantage of my baby girl " I love him so much "you are so cute honey, you'll be chasing boys away I see it now and if a boy I'll be chasing nasty girls away ," he chuckles " you and me babe, a team even more so as parents. " I nod and lean down and kiss his sweet lips. "Mia you and I getting married before the baby you're stil! Wanting that, right? " I nod "it's as important to me Brian and I love that you asked me to before our little baby is born it means so much Bri " he looks at me so sweetly "us being married is what I want, but even more so bringing our baby into this world, to two married people, a family , babe our family " hearing him say that brings tears to my eyes , happy tears I alwAys wanted this with him, my Bri, I wasn't sure at first that he'd want marriage and kids, but it worked out and I adore him , and the little Quinn in my stomach is the best part of all , I go back to rubbing his head playing with his hair, he lets out content sigh, it's a perfect night. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I can't hear what's being said, everything looks blurry too, what happened, I feel blood on my face, I'm in the back of an ambulance, an IV is in my hand the EMT tells me I'm ok, I say I'm pregnant , please is my baby ok , there other EMT looks at the one talking to me , I faintly hear him say they will put a fetal monitor on me he looks closer at me he says is you're name Mia? I nod yes he says he met me once at a bar he knows Q , he asks for my phone I don't know where it is he says it's ok I see him get on his phone , I hear him say Q, then the hospital we're headed to I feel awful pain in my head I grab it and cry , then I see darkness. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I'm running thru the parking lot, I was on set when my buddy Paul called from the firehouse Mia was in a car accident he doesn't know what happened but Carlos the EMT guy recognized her and called him, a million thoughts are in my head, please let her be ok please let our baby be ok, I ask at the front desk where she is I beat the ambulance I run out to where they pull in at, waiting Sal texts me he's on his way I say I beat here here, waiting for the ambulance, two pull in I wAtch them pull up, the first one opens not her , I run to the back one, she's in there I see her they open up I jump in Carlos tells me she was side swiped at fifth and main intersection she was unconscious when they got there she talked a little on the way but blacked out again, they know she's pregnant, her head is hurt I see the dried blood on the side of her face , a gash on her forehead, her left arms full of dried blood, they take her out I wAlk with them he tells me her vitals, the Drs come in I'm holding her hand that's not hurt, they fill them in I kiss her and stare at her I'm listening to them talk, someone asks who I am, I want her to open her eyee, I tell her I'm here , I love her, I kiss her face , they back me away from her I know it's protocol but it pisses me off, I wAnt to be with her, a nurse walks me out asking me her information, I give it to her, I wanna go to her I can't concentrate I feel like I'm going to lose it, I hear Joe's voice I turn to see him, Sal and James coming by me the nurse finishes up and we talk ,I tell them what I know Carlos told me the baby's heartbeat was good, but that's all I know, thank God and I need to know she's going to be ok, I feel like my chest is caving in Sal sits me down joe goes to get me water, I feel panic they are trying to calm me. I just want to see her, please .just please let me see her....that's all I want.


	21. Chapter 21

It's been almost seven hours since she's been here, she woke up twice both times she looked at me, I told her I love her, the baby is ok she has a bad concussion, she closes her eyes and drifts off, my parents are here, her brother Dominic, he called her mom in ohio, I don't know if she's coming frankly I hope not after the shit she said to her, but whatever, the baby's heartbeat is good, she's been hooked up to a fetal monitor since the ambulance, she has two broken ribs, a sprained arm and they stitched up her forehead she got hit hard, Carlos said the drivers side of her SUV was smashed so bad they pulled her from the passenger side, my poor baby, it's breAking my heart seeing her hurt, I wish it was me, I lean back in the chair next to her bed still holding her hand , Joe is back he brought food for all of us Sal just left, Murr fell asleep Joe hands me an ice tea "thanks buddy, Joe you should go home take Murr, long day for you I'm sure you miss the family " he shakes his head "I'm good Q, I'm staying a while, Sal left, he was dozing " I nod "he's gotta drive his cousin to the airport later I made him go home to sleep...." I look at Mia her arm moved , then nothing Joe pulls a chair by me " she's going to be ok, she's tough, and the baby is ok....it's scary I know, but you're keeping it together, good job cause it ain't easy I know " I nod hold her hand tighter " she was hit so hard Joe, what if.... " he puts his hand on my arm "no what ifs she's here, that's what matters, and when she wakes up you'll be here and she'll be so happy to see you" I nod and tear up I feel helpless, she's so sweet, I keep rubbing her hand staring at the ring I gave her, we we're just talking about our wedding, and the baby that was just last night and tonight we are here..it's crazy to me..how quickly life can change, I move my chair closer and lay my head on her bed I close my eyes I'm so tired, but I want to stay awake....I drift off. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ My God my body feels so stiff, I'm in a hospital, I'm so thirsty I focus my eyes I feel my stomach there's a monitor hooked up to me, my baby is ok, I mean why else would I be hooked up, to it I know I heard someone say the baby was ok, Brian is asleep his head in his arm on my bed, his parents are sleeping too...it's dark out I'm pretty sure breathing in and out hurts I reach down and feel something gauze like on my side, my wrist is wrapped, I'm thinking I know I was in a car accident but how did it happen? I move my hand to Brian s arm, I tap it...He makes a sound, I tap it again his head shoots up "baby , honey ....Hi I mean are you ok? " I nod whisper I'm thirsty, he gets a bottle of water from the table by me and holds it to my lips raising it so I can drink "Mia baby do you know what happened?" I nod yes " hurts when I exhale " he nods "you have two broken ribs , your wrist is sprained, you got stitched up your forehead...the baby is ok, no harm at all " I nod then cry, I feel horrible, I'm releaved our baby is ok, he looks beat my poor Brian " baby no, don't cry please " he gets up kisses my cheek holds my hand kisses it " my head hurts so much " He sighs "it's a concussion honey , you hit you're head pretty hard , they can't give you really strong meds since you're pregnant, but if you need more they said a little stronger won't hurt the baby just ...not too many times you can take it " I shake my head no, carefully I want nothing stronger I know it's bad for the baby " hurts lot but...it will be ok...Bri I remember hearing get hit the metal crashing, and I thought I heard you're voice when they put me in the ambulance, crazy but you were saying you're ok baby I love you , I'm right here " he nods "I told you that in the ER after you got wheeled in from the ambulance I beat it here " my God he was there , I heard him just not when I thought I did, "I couldn't tell...but hearing you're voice I knew I was safe , my Brian was with me " he smiles a little I see him getting emotional, I don't want him to be sad "babe I'm ok, baby Quinn is too, it's going to be ok, I promise" I squeeze his hand, and close my eyes I'm so tired ,but I open them and look at him he's so worried I look over at his sleeping parents "they weren't leaving either of us..." I smile they are so great I really love them , I love their son so very much too, I'm glad he's here , I'm glad he's mine, always .


	22. Chapter 22

Home sweet home I'm thrilled to be in my own bed, Jasper asleep by me, so! Three kitties in the bedroom scattered  
I missed them , I missed my bed, I missed it all...Brian is downstairs talking to his parents, my brother Dominic left a little bit ago I came home this morning, it's almost 7pm...I lean back and place my hand on my stomach thinking of my baby, ever so grateful baby Quinn was ok, never in any danger , I'm fortunate too, could have been so much worse , Bri brings me a cup of tea sets it down kisses my cheek "baby you hungry? My mom put three meAls in the freezer two in the fridge " I smile she's so great "I will eat, soon did you ?" He nods " I ate earlier I'm waiting to eat with you , the pillows good? You warm enough?, Your bandage ok? " he's so darn sweet and caring he needs sleep he's exhausted "baby after you eat, please lay down, get sleep you need it , I'm ok I swear to you, you've taken such great care of me you really are amazing baby , now I want you to rest cause I love you and care about you're well being" he nods then winks at me " I will get into bed right next to you, let's eat I'll shower ok? " I nod and move to get up "no stay in bed I'll bring you food, anything you need I will get it or do for you " I look at him, this man is so good to me "I can't ever thank you enough , you are so good to me " "thank me? Honey I'm the one who Will always take care of you no matter what, you , the baby are my life, when you(he looks down at the floor) ..when I saw you in the back of the ambulance, I had so many emotions, I thought I couldn't breathe, knowing the baby was ok , a huge relief but...I needed to know you were ok, I don't know...I mean...(he's trying to find his words, he's upset) I can't ever be without you, I know....someday when we're old...it'll ...but I'm going first so that way I won't ever be without you...besides usually the guy goes first ..I'm sorry about that babe...but it's better for me ...I love you so much...you know when we we're first together, dating I wouldn't admit to myself how much I loved you it scared me, sounds odd I know but...I knew you had my heart then, back then I knew " I can't help but tear up I get up he holds my hand to help me up , I hug him and lay my head on his chest , I can't talk , I'll cry, his words are perfect , like him, my Bri. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ Long Long day on set today , I'm so ready to leave, Mia is out of town she had to go to Ohio for a funeral a friend of hers passed away, I wanted to go but we are filming, Dominic couldn't go with his business, it's been almost a month since the accident I would just feel better if she did not go alone, she's there the funeral is tomorrow she's staying with her brother Nick and his family since she won't talk to her mom after the comments she made about our baby, I really wanna drive up there and follow her home tomorrow it's a 9 hour drive , she said no she's fine, I still worry. Sal comes sits by me "beers? You up please say you are, I need unwinding , murrs in and Jay some crew " I nod yes "you read my mind I gotta stop home feed Jasper let em out and kitties" Sal nods "good meet up at tin can I'm so ready man for drinking " we wrap up and I head out, home to take care of the animals and face-time my girl. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I do another shot with Jay, Mike and a our friend Micah from the show, he does the lightening, Ellie dropped by about an hour ago to hang with more crew, she kept looking at me, I nodded and smiled then went back to the guys, Sal called uber about 20 min ago and left, Murr is still here hanging, our crowd is smaller now I notice Ellie and Sam moved to the end of our table, I drink another shot I got an uber here, will take one home too , so another shot works well, I notice eventually Ellie is one chair away from me, she casually looks over at me I nod I feel too good to even care what she s doing I finish my beer, its almost 2 am I am about done...I get my wallet out & drop it, I go to reach for it and Ellie hands it to me, I say thanks and she is now sitting next to me" you leaving Bri?" I nod yes..."yeah heading home " she nods I see Jay looking at us, then goes back to his beer and talking , Ellie sees my phone light up a text from Sal telling me he made it home" that your girlfriend huh?" commenting on the lock screen pic of me and Mia at a Yankees game its one of my favorites of us I nod yes " she's very pretty Brian" I look at her...she's smiling "yes. yes she is she's my finance not girlfriend" she raises her eyebrows then smiles again at me " well congratulations Bri...wow from a man who never wanted marriage or kids" I smile "yeah,well I got both now and I am happy" she stares at me..as If taking in what I just said, "both? she's pregnant?" I nod yes, she looks at me surprised, "wow , Bri a baby..from a man who never ever wanted kids...one of the reasons we broke up " I sigh " Ellie I don't want to get into this with you , it was A reason, not the only..so.." she looks upset then turns into a smile on her face her hand rests on my thigh" you know you were , the best lover I have ever had?" I look at her, then down at her hand on my thigh " well thanks for that , but (I move her hand from my thigh) gotta go home..." she smirks "Bri I know she's outta town , so...why not come home with me" did she really just say that? " fucks sake ellie..come on , you know I am not going to do that " "are you sure Bri? (she leans into me her face inches from mine) no one has to ever know " she runs her hand down my thigh all the way up she can feel I am hard...dammit she knows now. ...ok yeah she made me excited but that does not mean anything ...she smells so damn good too I remember a lot...the sex...wtf am I doing? enough I tell myself...I move my hand to move her arm from being draped on my thigh , when her lips meet mine, she kisses me softly , her tounge runs over my bottom lip , she pulls back a little staring at me , wtf ...dammit what is she doing? I shake my head and get up and leave, I feel too much right now and I feel like a pos for it.


	23. Chapter 23

I'm not sure how...why I did what I did...wtf is wrong with me???!!!! All I had to do was stand and wait for the uber , she came outside while I was waiting , pulled her car up next to me in the lot , put her window down, saying she'd drop me off save time, money I checked my phone my uber was still 20 min away, fuck I shouldn't have gotten into her car I don't remember her driving , or her pulling into my driveway , I remember saying thanks , and her moving over straddling my lap, she felt so good sitting in my lap, her lips on my neck, I was feeling good her body pressed into mine her hands on my chest then waist , before I knew it she was riding me , fuck can I blame it on being drunk? No , yes I can blame it on me being a complete and utter fuck up, I'm engaged with a baby on the way and I fucked my ex , in my driveway , what am I going to do? How can I look at Mia, I can't lose her, I just can't , Sal and Joe are at the door I needed them, I need advice I love James, but he's not good with this stuff....I let them in , they look concerned  
Worried I tell them , Sal s mouth drops open, Joe shakes his head "Brian why? How fucked up were you!?" I look at Sal " I was pretty drunk " Joe stares at me" why ? One time Brian you fucked up big time, Mia is the best woman ever you've dated, you're marrying her, having a baby with her, and you fuck that bitch? " Joe s pissed , he rarely swears this much "I knew she was trying for you again, hell we all saw it and you made it easy for her didn't you, dammit '"  
I hang my head "I love Mia , with everything I am, I had no excuse doing what I did, none she's my life I adore her  
And our baby, she's going to fucking leave me, I know it , I know it!!!" I sit down on my couch and cry Sal sits next to me pats my back, Joe sits on my chair I look up wipe my eyes, and cry more "she's not going to leave you " I look up at Sal he nods "what ??!! Yeah she will and she should " Sal shakes his head "no Brian she's not cause you're not telling her" I look at him then Joe "sal I ....can't not tell her" "why does ...look one time one mistake, you love her, a baby on the way, marriage you wanna lose it all? No you don't ,you want to raise you're baby in two homes? Broken home? Arguing about visitation, not having Mia with you, not get married, no you do not, are you for sure had sex with her?" I think I swear she was riding me, but was I in her or was she grinding on me? I thought . ...fuck "I honestly don't know the more ...I think about it.....I may have , or not she was grinding on me sitting in my lap, she was rubbing my...you know ...I swear i had a...." " ok maybe it was just a hand job not great but better than sex " my cell rings it's Mia I wipe my face compose myself and take the call in the kitchen. I hear Joe and Sal talking I walk further away "are you really telling him not to tell her ?!". " Joe you heard him right he's not even sure he fucked her, he was wasted you know when he's that drunk he s not sure he's gonna throw all it away on a I am not sure? Fuck that, he will go into deep depression Joe then what? We get that call he hurt himself? Fuck that I'm not letting that happen Joe I love him It may be shitty to do to her, but he s important to me and you he adores her, she's his life he fucked up yeah , but he's not even sure , what happened, Joe help me convince him, please " Joe nods , Sal makes good points but he still feels bad about all of this. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ She's due home soon lots of traffic in Pennsylvania , held her up some, I'm anxious I know deep down it's wrong to not tell her, but Sal and Joe are right can I tell her what happened when I don't even know for sure, I love her I'll never forgive myself for it, but I can't lose her..ever. I hear her pull into the garage she opens the side door walking into the laundry room I grab her and hug her tight "omg I missed you my bri, so much " she reaches up to kiss me , I kiss her back I missed her, I feel funny for a few mins, knowing what I did but I push it aside "baby I'm glad you're home you're so beautiful" I lean down kiss her belly " hi baby, welcome back daddy missed you" I hear Mia laugh and look up at her, I roll her suitcase into the kitchen she takes her coat off, I gasp she has a bump a tiny bump I see it now with her coat off she puts her hands on her belly "you see it! ? I popped a little I couldn't wait till you saw, honey little Quinn is growing " I nod and tear up, tears roll down my cheeks, she comes over and hugs me "aww baby you're too cute, I love you " I hold her tight , I feel like a pos, I don't know how I'm going to do this. She moves back kisses me Jasper comes over she kneels down to pet him, and Benjamin who sauntered over I watch her , she gets up looks at me " I want you, Bri, I need to feel you in me " she smirks I stand there staring at her, she looks sexy, she's biting her bottom lip fuck me , I take her hand and lead her up and into our bedroom I attach my lips to hers and kiss her hard, I yank at her clothes , she unzips my jeans, we undress one another I lay down with her , she nips at my neck, I groan and thrust into her she yells my name, I look into her eyes, I feel guilty , but her eyes are beautiful, I move faster and harder I fuck her senseless , she can't get enough , I love it, "I'm not hurting you an I ?" " no , baby feels so good my Bri, sooooooo good " I nod and pull out then slam into her she yells grabs my shoulders I feel the need to show her how much I love her, she tells me she's cumming, I explode in her , she holds me close I lay my head on her shoulder "best welcome home ever my Bri " I look up smile at her, this will get easier , I hope it has to, it just does.


	24. Chapter 24

I wrap my arms around him from behind he's making us eggs I kiss his back and lay my head on it "smells good honey thanks for making breakfast" I nod she moves stands next to me facing me " I was hoping we could go pick out the dresser and crib today " I nod " sure baby we can get that done today , you pick out a rocker yet? " I nod "I did and the footrest here I'll show you " I get my phone and pull up the rocker I chose and show him he smiles "I like it babe and I cleared out the closet in the future nursery while you were gone (when I couldn't sleep from the guilt ) the bed Danny's coming to get , the dresser too, you pick out any paint colors yet?" I shake my head no " I can't decide but I think the sage green and oatmeal is my favorite, you like those ? " he nods "I really like the sage green for sure , the oatmeal color will look good with it, I'll paint it too " I look at him "are you sure? I know you said you really don't like painting" he shrugs " it's for my baby, I'll do it " he's so sweet I reach up and kiss his cheek we sit and have breAkfast then get ready to go, it's chilly but a nice day,the sun is out , I love spending the day with him, and no filming today , I get him  
He's kinda quiet but he's happy , we finally find the furniture we liked the walnut color one, crib, dresser and tall chest , they are being delivered next Wednesday, wow baby furniture, he puts his hand on my belly while we wait for the receipt, "our baby is in there I'm still in awe of that fact , we did this" he's so sweet I kiss him " and then there we're three " he smiles we get the receipt and go find a place to have lunch , I'm getting sleepy, after lunch we head home, and I change and take a nap, I'm so sleepy, my second trimester is just as I read about very tired, I'm liking my naps, Brian says he'll join me soon kisses me heads downstairs, I close my eyes. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@\@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I'm going to tell her...no I can't fuck this isn't easier its worse, I keep thinking, back to that night, I look at Mia and feel Horrible, she won't Understand, but she may, forgive me in time? Oh fuck me I need to breathe, calm down, I feel like the room is coming down , I go outside and stand on our patio, breathing in the cool air, get a grip I tell myself, my mia, my baby, I can't screw up, anymore than I have....but I'm going to her anytime I look at her, right? No? I go in and grab a beer from the fridge , I down it, then get another I lean against the kitchen counter and finish that one too. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ He's yelling he scared me to death, he's asleep I came down the steps quickly trying to wake him, I'm rubbing his arm trying to wake him, he's yelling he's sorry, so sorry , I shake him his eyes pop open "Brian honey wake up you're dreaming, can you hear me? Bri? Honey ??!!!" He blinks then focuses his eyes I hold his hand he sits up puts his head in his hands I sit next to him rubbing his back, I hate when this happens to him, he looks at me I smile at him he puts his head back into his hands I continue to rub his back , after a while he stands up walks to the window in the living room his back is to me " why do you love me? I mean you fell in love with me, what about me , why, why me? " he turned to look at me, " you made me laugh, the night I met you, remember? " he nods " you're eyes never left mine that night at the diner when we talked, you're very sweet Bri, you're gentle with me, even when I ask you the same question like five times, and I do that alot, you're patient, you have this beautiful wonderful way about you that makes me feel loved, every day, why you? Because you're the man I've been wanting to be with, we aren't perfect , no such thing, but it's pretty darn close, I love the man you are, and that man you are loves me " I cry, I just stand there and cry she gets up and wraps her arms around me "I don't , you're too good for me mia, " she moves away from me, "no , not true please don't , you really think that?" I nod wipe my face she looks sad , oh fuck me " why brian? Why do you feel that way, why can't you see what a beautiful person you are? Is it me? Am I making you feel that way ? ". "God no Mia, not ...no I love you so much, all I feel is love , from you, it's within me, I'm a fuck up , you're not " she shakes her head "sorry but the father of my baby is not a fuck up, he's a great guy, who I love with everything I am, and always will" I sigh "you can't say you always will, people change, things happen " she stares at me "I can say always, I'm not changing my mind about you..........maybe you're changing you're mind about me??!" She tears up " no! No Mia that's so far from accurate, never ever Mia never would I leave you" she nods she's crying , cause of me I hug her to my chest"I'm sorry Mia I'm so sorry " she nods and hugs me tight, I'm sorry for what I did, so sorry I think in my head, I need to see my therapist, I need to before I lose my mind, she moves back " I'm here , the good and the bad Bri I love you for you no matter what you know that ? " I nod she reaches up kisses my lips , gently, no matter what? I pray so, man I hope she meAns that.


	25. Chapter 25

I keep looking at her, waiting ...She looks at me over her cup of tea I made her sitting in my kitchen , "you know I love you, you know you're my best friend, and I've never been untruthful to you (I nod) , I know you love him, I know he loves you, that aside, his I don't know panic attacks? Outbursts? Do you think he's doing it because he's going to be a dad? Or the fact you're getting married? And not to say he regrets those things, ok he kept saying he's sorry ?" I nod " he said I'm so sorry, I'm sorry , I didn't ask him about it, I don't know even know if he realized it, I just feel helpless when it happens,it's almost like, I feel....there is something he's not telling me, I don't know I could be wrong, Michelle I just want him to be ok, and right now he's not and it's hurting me " she looks at her cup of tea then me "you're four months pregnant, you're stress level needs to be closer to a one not a ten, I don't like to see you upset, I'm not going to add to you're stress but listen to me, you have to let him work it out, I'm glad he went to see his therapist, it hopefully helps him, and you wanting to help him, well I would never expect anything less from you , I want you to promise me you will take care of yourself" " Michelle of course I will, my baby comes first , just I hope it helps him today , he's such a good man " she nods I'm so glad I have her in my life.  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ It's quiet I hear the ticking on my watch, Fran moves in her chair adjusts her glasses "Brian do you still want to marry Mia?" I nod " I absolutely do, I love her , and I know what I did was so wrong, it wasn't planned , I just feel horrible " She looks at me "mistakes are made, and forgiven, yes what you did was wrong since you're in a committed relationship with someone, who is also pregnant with you're child, Brian the guilt you feel , is normal, how do you think once you tell her , what will happen between you two?" I shake my head " I'm petrified she's going to leave me, and I'll be without her, and I can't ....that can't happen, she's my girl, I fucked up I have to fix it, I'm afraid once I say it , it'll never be the same between us" she nods "Brian it wasn't the same between you the moment you had physical contact With Ellie, the outcome could be favorable, women tend to forgive someone they love more so than a man, flip the story what if Mia did this, and told you ?" " I'd forgive her, I love her too much to let her go " that's the damn truth . @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I peck his cheek, we are sitting on the couch reading , he kisses the top of my head, it's late afternoon, it snowed so much out, our plow guy came back a second time to clear the driveway . "Oh, the insurance company called, the check for the SUV is being fed exed tomorrow" he pulls me closer "have you decided on what you want yet ?" I shake my head no " no rush we have the jeep, if you need it and I film I can catch a ride with Sal ". I look up at him "I've narrowed it down to the Honda pilot, or a four runner , both have four stars in safety " he nods "the BMW suv I showed you does too ". "Bri that's too much money , my check almost pays for the two I like since my old SUV was only a year old ". "I'll buy you whatever you want , it's a sweet ride" I smirk "you really like it don't you ?" He laughs " yeah I do...but you know you're choice baby " his text goes off he reaches over I see him frown as he reads it he sighs "Oh man" "what is it ?" He sighs again deeply " we've been hooked to play Atlantic city this weekend four shows leave tomorrow afternoon " I dislike when this happens but it does their tour manager has places asking for them, and when he sees them having time off he grabs it , without asking the guys , well he Will mention it casually before hand but that usher means he said yes "well it's not that far , and you like doing the shows " he s reading the other texts from the guys "joe is not happy he had plans to take the family to Rhode island this weekend, eh.. sometimes I just wanna say no ...but..." I hold his hand " I'm sure you do, but you love this , and TESD more than anything, you worked hard Bri , have fun " he shakes his head no , "I love you and our baby more than anything " I can't help but smile I move over him and straddle his lap Giving him a deep kiss "now that was sweet Mr Quinn" " truth future Mrs Quinn " he moves his lips to mine and kisses me just as deeply he runs his hands down my back I move my hands down his chest and to his waistband of his pants I move my hand into his pants he stops kissing me and freezes I look at him " what's wrong? " he looks upset he moves me off of him and gets up he falters for words " I just, thought of something for the tour this weekend, and I ..gotta call I'm sorry, it's sorry my head is full " he takes his phone and goes upstairs, I feel stupid , he's never stopped me, us from kissing , touching, what the hell just happened? @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I can't ...fuck all I saw was Ellie straddling me that night wtf am I doing???? The look on her face, why did I react like that ? And my dumb ass excuse, she's going to not believe that...my hands are shaking I need to settle down.man up and tell her, I splash cold water on my face , take deep breathes and head downstairs full of anxiety, fear and hope.


	26. Chapter 26

I come down the stairs she's in the kitchen emptying the dishwasher, she looks up at me as I stand in the doorway  
I shove my hands in my pockets "wanna talk Bri?" I nod she pulls two chairs out at the kitchen table she sits I move then sit down I look at her " Brian I know you are having anxiety about the baby and us getting married , you really want to get married before the baby comes I know, I do too but why don't we wait to get married, and just focus on the baby, our lives...it's a lot for us both , is that something you'd be ok with ? " I'm looking at her, she's so worried about me she's trying to make it better, but there's so much more to this , that she doesn't know, that she needs to know  
That I have to tell her "I think that's ...yeah ok...you want this too?" She nods " I'm ....I mean I gave it a lot of thought  
And I think it's best for us , it's hard for anyone to plan a wedding and birth of a baby, let alone with us, you're so busy and we have to plan around the shows I mean they added shows now and before the cruise, it's making you anxious and in turn that makes me anxious " "Mia baby....I have to tell you something, its...not easy to tell you , i.....(I'm struggling for the words, she's going to be hurt I can't stand it she's staring at me ) when you went to Ohio I went out with Sal , James, and some crew we went to the tin can after filming, I drank a lot, I called an uber to bring me home, I uh....Ellie offered me a ride home (I see her whole body stiffen ) she brought me home and " she stands up "you're going to tell me you had sex with her?". "No ...I mean we kissed(I see her cringe) and she sat on my lap, I think she  
It was just a hand job" she turns red "you think!!!??? You don't know if you had sex? Cause you were so wasted is that what you're telling me??!!" I nod she's so mad, " Mia... " she puts her hand up then slams it on the table "you kissed her in our home ?" I shake my head no " we were in her car in the driveway " "Oh ok...the driveway that's great....you took a ride from your ex while you were drunk...She straddled you.....oh...omg thats why you ...just acted that way!  
And you may have screwed her, or the bitch gave you a hand job?". I could puke " I'm ...almost certain it waste sex " she stares at me, I can barely look at her, she doesn't say anything for what seems a while tears are rolling down her cheeks I wanna hug her so bad I'm sure, she won't want that she wipes her face in a shaky voice she says to me " I never thought the words you said to me , would ever come out of you're mouth, that you would cheat on me, but you did, what's worse you've known ...three days, you've lived a lie, my God Brian the night I came home we had sex, you touched me, you ...and the night before she had her hands on you're dick, why Brian? You wanted her more than me??You asked me to marry you, I'm pregnant with you're child....(She's sobbing now , I start to cry I stand up ) she puts her hand up "don't come near me, I can't ....I love you so much Brian you broke my heart ....I can't " she's crying so much she walks past me to the hallway I turn follow her, she puts her coat on she takes her purse off the hook "don't go Mia please don't leave...I'm so sorry I'm so damn sorry " she looks at me the pain in her eyes kills me"that night you had the bad dream , you yelled I'm sorry...yeah it all fits now " she has the jeep keys and phone walks towArds the door I move past her blocking it "please stay , Mia don't go....baby please look at me...I love you, it was a horrible, mistake I didn't mean it...I can't not be with you , please I'm begging you " I'm crying she's crying she shakes her head no...She can barely talk "pl...please...mmm move ...I .... I have to get out of here please !" She won't look at me, I stand there  
she doesn't move ...I ...move ..I don't want to but I have to , for her she opens the door "I love you Mia" she pauses then walks out the door I stAnd there, ....I see the jeep back out from the garage she pulls out and leaves, she needs time , I know ..I just can't ...I close the door , lean on it and cry, I'm lost, I feel like my heart just left, in a way it did I can only hope she'll forgive me...I need her, I love her , I know she loves me...I hope it's enough to fix us.


	27. Chapter 27

It's almost one am I'm trying to sleep I'm exhausted I can't stop crying, I stopped at target and got pjs , underwear a few other things I felt like I walked around in a haze, I did actually, I bought a salad and forced myself to eat it, I hadn't eaten since oatmeal in the morning, baby needs nutrients, I'm laying on a bed at a Hilton gardens hotel it's about an hour from home, 12 missed calls no texts from him...why I ask myself that over and over, he loves me so much, I'm his everything, yeah guess not, I love him so much, and that bitch couldn't wait I'm sure to make her move, she just had to come back , worst part is I blame him more than her and I hate that. He touched her, kissed her, his sweet lips , her hands on him, and maybe they had sex, or she got him off...and I can't let my mind wander to what he may have done to her, it hurts so much, I get up to brush my teeth, I get the toothbrush and toothpaste from the target bag I look in the mirror, my eyes are so puffy, my nose looks like Rudolph 's, I want to hate him, I just can't ....it would be so much easier if I hated him, I love him, he's mine not hers! Mine she had her chance with him, two years later she pulls this...I hate her, I can do that easily , I finish up then get into bed, my text goes off my iPhone screen lights up, my background picture , me and Bri, from last year's cruise, I open the text he sent sender: my Bri ...Mia ,baby I know you're mad , hurt , I'm so sorry, I never , it wasn't planned, it's something that just happened, I don't know if that matters to you but I wanted to tell you, please just let me know you're ok, I can leave and you stay here, if you want, please just let me know where you are, I'm worried, I miss you baby, I love you , I love our baby . I sigh I text back to:my Bri ....I'm at a hotel, I'll come home after you leave for Atlantic city, I don't , I can't see you Brian, my heart is broken, I don't know what to do, I don't know much anything anymore. I hit send and go get the new charger I bought since I left mine, I open it plug it in and lay down, I finally feel like I can fall asleep, alone..........I miss him.  
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I'm in a limo bus it's taking us to Atlantic city, I feel like shit, I probably look like it too, I don't give a fuck , Joe and Sal know , they filled James in, I don't wanna talk to anyone, I wanna get these fucking shows behind me and go home, and hopefully she's still there when I get back , I texted her what time I was leaving , she said she'd be home after I left, that's it, that's all ,not seeing her is bad enough, hardly any communication is killing me, I put my ear buds in and hit my playlist, I select guns n roses, I lean my head back close my eyes,I don't know if she's going to stay or ....I can't imagine my life without her, raising our baby in seperate homes, she's my girl no matter what that's what she'll always be, I feel someone sit next to me I open my eyes , see it's James , I take my ear buds out "yeah?" I say to him I'm in no mood to talk " I know you don't wanna talk, I'll respect that but....just let me say this...you wanna talk, hang after a show, whatever let me know ok? " the guy really is being sincere I appreciate it I do " thanks man, thank you " he pats my arm then goes I put my ear buds in and of course November rain by gnr is on , fml ....fuck I miss her.


	28. Chapter 28

Sal is driving me home , the limo bus dropped us off, an hour ago we are close to home , I'm nervous we had no communication all weekend , I buzzed thru the shows, I drank more than I should have but I needed sleep with not seeing her, not talking to her , it was unbearable "Brian buddy , text or you know call me if you need anything, ok?"  
I nod ... "Its a good sign she's there , I mean you know? " I nod "I'm not sure what's gonna happen Sal but thanks for ,just being here,this is hard thanks for having my back like always " "there's no other way it'd be Brian , ever " he's my best friend, I have a few I'm a lucky man,this has been a dark spot in my life, I'm pretty proud I haven't spiraled down , I was afraid of that, I worked hard, I can't let her see that, too much is at stake no matter that I feel dead inside without her. We are a few minutes away , I'm so damn nervous ...I feel myself perspire, I take deep breathes...  
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I hear the door open and the sound of his suitcase on the wooden floor in the hallway , I feel like I'm going to puke and not from the baby, I walk to the kitchen doorway he hangs his jacket up ,he looks at me, his beard needs trimming  
He's awfully scruffy , his brown eyes stare into my eyes, his hair under his Yankee cap is sticking out more than usual "how are you feeling? " I look at him and put my left hand on my stomach, "I'm feeling ok, I have a Dr appointment Wednesday , an ultrasound, ....if you want to go to it " he nods his head "course I do, wow an ultrasound , get to see our baby " I nod he walks to me as are inches away from one another, the need to touch him is immense, he puts his hand on my stomach, rubs it a little I feel the baby kick, Brian's eyes light up "oh my god, did you feel that ???!!!" I can't help but smile he's so excited " I did baby's been kicking , alot I felt the first kick Friday morning , mostly the kicking is around now night time , most active I've been keeping track " he looks so sweet omg I'm mad at him, and here I am thinking how sweet he is, I must be completely crazy i move to turn to go back into the kitchen his hand touches mine, I feel a shiver run thru my body , "I'm going to bed" he nods I walk past him then stop "are you coming to bed?" My back is to him , I don't turn around I hear him say quietly he will be right up I turn down the covers and get into bed , moments pass I hear him coming up the stairs , he walks in and goes into the bathroom he comes out turning the lamp off and gets into bed I'm facing him , after a few minutes he places his hand on my cheek, I tear up he moves closer to me I move my head to his chest and wrap my arm around him , he hugs me to him I start to cry, I just don't know....but I missed him and right here, right now is all I want, he whispers he's sorry , so sorry , my tears keep falling his chest feels wet against my face , I start to drift off to sleep, content he's here knowing our problems will be here in the morning, but right now is where I am.


	29. Chapter 29

I hardly slept , I watched her sleep, I rested my hand on her stomach, felt the baby moving around I'm just so in awe a life we created is in there, I missed her so much I didn't know what to expect when I got home, not this , she wanted me in bed next to her, I'm not dumb, I know we aren't ok but seems like she still wants me, she's my girl, always  
She stirs then opens her eyes, I smile at her , she smiles then gets up going into the bathroom, I scrub my face with my hands run my fingers thru my hair, she comes out and gets back in bed facing me " you sleep ok? " I shrug "not really  
I'll try and nap later ....Mia whatever it takes to get us back....I'm willing to do" she sits up I fix the pillow behind her, then sit up she looks at me " I know you're sorry , I know it wasn't something that was...done on purpose, you know it would be so much easier if I could hate you....but I can't I just can't oh I tried sounds awful but it made me feel better  
But only for a few minutes and truth , I couldn't hate you, I love you too much , and the baby is in in all this, look I'm going to be mad about this , I don't know how long but...I love you bri, I love us, I love our baby.....I forgive you ...I truly do....(I feel all the tension release from me , I feel like I can breathe again,I'm looking at this woman who loves me so much, she forgives me for what I did, I'm so overwhelmed , my God I love her, "Mia baby I promise you , never again baby, I'm so sorry I love you so damn much, just you Mia " she tears up , trying to compose herself I move closer to her take her hand in mine kiss her hand " Bri ...I can't be without you ever, but please ....never hurt me like that again, promise me ? " tears fall down my face " never baby, I promise " she lays her head on my shoulder I wrap my arms around her , hold her to me, my body feels less stress,I hope hers too, she deserves nothing but happiness  
My girl always,....always. We stay like that till we fall back asleep I've haven't felt this content in a long time.  
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We went to our favorite Italian restaurant for dinner, hadn't been in months beside the food, it's secluded , we know the owners, it's always nice they accommodate us, she puts her hands on her belly "Bri feel (she grabs my hand places it on her belly man little Quinn is kicking "baby loves pasta, which makes sense since I'm Italian, and perhaps future soccer player "I grin "I'm betting on both babe " I lean in and kiss her, I missed her lips, her kisses , her touches, her , she kisses me back then nips my bottom lip I groan she smirks I want her so bad , but I don't say it, has to be her, I meAn it sounds ridiculous but...it's up to her , we get our food boxed up I hand our server my card she runs her thumb over my hand, I love that, she knows it...we get home I let jasper out then fill the water dishes , I go upstairs to change , she's standing in the bathroom doorway , in her lace pj set a tank and shorts fuck she looks sexy, I unbutton my shirt to change she motion s me over, I stand in front of her she finishes unbuttoning my shirt, her lips go right to my chest  
Her lips feel so good I moan I feel her grin against my chest I place my hand on her hips she looks up at me " sexy man, you want to fuck me ? " oh my God yes " baby I do, so bad " she takes my hand leading me to our bed she lays down I finish taking my shirt off and lay half on her , half on the bed, it feels so good I run my hand under the tank gently caressing her boobs she bites her bottom lip, I move my hand down , I slowly peel down her shorts and panties she's wet, so wet I rub her clit she grabs my shoulder and moans , she pushs at my pants , I move to help her take THem off , she pulls hers down I help her with those too ...I slowy move her legs and push into her , it's been a while tighter than normal feels amazing ....She leans up kisses me "you're mine Brian Micheal Quinn, just mine!" I push deeper into her and move a little faster " I'm yours baby " she moves her hips up " fuck me Bri, " she's so fucking sexy I move faster , it's frenzied I rub her clit again she moans , so much , words are being said , kissing , thrusting, I feel her legs shake as she cums I cum right then too , fuck it's so good my God she's amazing , so fucking amazing .


	30. Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Epilouge

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and so this story ends....
> 
> and a new one begins
> 
> look for ," It's Me and You...till the end"  
> as the journey with Brian and Mia continues...

It's a beautiful fall day, the leaves are so bright it's sunny and 73 a perfect day , I'm putting the rake back in the shed  
I hear laughing and squealing I look up at our deck and see two sweet faces waving at me, they bound down the stairs and run to me, I laugh kneel down and scoop them up into my arms, kissing each one on the cheek , Landon Joseph Michael Quinn just turned four last week, Amelia Margaret Quinn who will be three on Christmas Eve hugs my neck giving me kisses on my cheek while Landon is telling me come in and play legos, I carry them inside , put them down they run into the living room to the pile of legos , I pull my sleeves up and wash my hands I feel arms wrap around me from behind and a kiss on my back I shake the water from my hands , wipe them on a piece of paper towel turn around and smile at my Mia , she plays with the hair on my forehead " I love you my Bri " I smile lean down kiss her lips "I love you as well Mrs Quinn" she smiles and hugs me tight , I love her like no other and those two little munchkins in the living room , we go in and sit and commence the playing of legos , Landon loves to build things, he's so sweet and kind, he adores Amelia, she's a fiesty one but he takes it all in stride, he's my mini me, in looks and mannerisms , but he has Mia s gorgeous hazel eyes, they both do, Amelia looks like her mama but me too she's a good mix, she is so stubborn , she gets that from her mama and head strong , I hope she keeps that up thru life, and dark curly hair that is usually in pig tails, as that s what she asks for every morning, and I do one hell of a job at it if I do say so myself. I love playing with them , I have been so busy with touring lately its good to be home for a while, I also have side projects I am working on and Mia is heading those up for us, the show won't last forever and I have a family to take care of, still doing tesd, which I love, I think more than anything else I do. Life has a lot of ups and downs I remember tough times with Mia, but the good outweigh the bad so much , I am lucky a man, she has never left my side, she's a great Mom, which I knew she would be, she has given me a new outlook on life, that I am forever grateful for , my two amazing kids, all her encouragement, her love has helped me in my career and life, no one will ever love me like she does, I still tell her there us "no one like you" and I know there never will be.


End file.
